The next to be placed among the regiment of fools are such as make a
trade of telling or inquiring after incredible stories of miracles and
prodigies: never doubting that a lie will choke them, they will muster
up a thousand several strange relations of spirits, ghosts, apparitions,
raising of the devil, and such like bugbears of superstition, which the
farther they are from being probably true, the more greedily they are
swallowed, and the more devoudy believed. And these absurdities do not
only bring an empty pleasure, and cheap divertisement, but they are a
good trade, and procure a comfortable income to such priests and friars
as by this craft get their gain. To these again are nearly related such
others as attribute strange virtues to the shrines and images of saints
and martyrs, and so would make their credulous proselytes believe, that
if they pay their devotion to St. Christopher in the morning, they
shall be guarded and secured the day following from all dangers and
misfortunes: if soldiers, when they first take arms, shall come and
mumble over such a set prayer before the picture of St. Barbara, they
shall return safe from all engagements: or if any pray to Erasmus on
such particular holidays, with the ceremony of wax candles, and other
fopperies, he shall in a short time be rewarded with a plentiful
increase of wealth and riches. The Christians have now their gigantic
St. George, as well as the pagans had their Hercules; they paint the
saint on horseback, and drawing the horse in splendid trappings, very
gloriously accoutred, they scarce refrain in a literal sense from
worshipping the very beast. What shall I say of such as cry up and
maintain the cheat of pardons and indulgences? that by these compute the
time of each soul's residence in purgatory, and assign them a longer or
shorter continuance, according as they purchase more or fewer of these
paltry pardons, and saleable exemptions? Or what can be said bad enough
of others, who pretend that by the force of such magical charms, or
by the fumbling over their beads in the rehearsal of such and such
petitions (which some religious impostors invented, either for
diversion, or what is more likely for advantage), they shall procure
riches, honour, pleasure, health, long life, a lusty old age, nay, after
death a sitting at the right hand of our Saviour in His kingdom; though
as to this last part of their happiness, they care not how long it
be deferred, having sca