e
all standing at the entrance and Scottie said, "Bink, go and ask the
attendant for a program." Bink walked up to the lady at the table, and
in his most polite tone said, "Can you let me have a program?"
Evidently the attendant didn't hear, for there was no answer, so Bink
said in a louder tone, "Say, look here, I want a program"; still there
was no response and Bink was beginning to look sore when Scottie yells
out, "Come away from there, you darn fool; are you going to talk to
that wax figure all day?" Scottie would have "cashed in" right there
if Bink could have caught him.

The same day we had a good joke on Steve--he had heard that Leicester
Lounge was a favourite meeting-place for Canadians, and he decided to
go there and see if he could find any of the boys, so he hailed a taxi
and gave the man orders to drive him to Leicester Lounge. The driver
took him round a couple of blocks and then said, "Here's the place,
Sir." Steve paid him and then looked around to find himself in the
very spot he started from--he had been standing in front of Leicester
Lounge when he took the taxi, and it is just as well that he does not
know what that driver thought of him--however, he was sport enough to
tell the joke on himself. Well, the week slipped by and we took a
couple of extra days on our own account--of course we expected to pay
up for it, but we thought it was worth it. Our next leave would be
from France, and anything might happen before then. Well, we got back,
and to our joy, we found that the Orderly Sergeant had got "soused" and
forgot to mark us absent, so maybe we were not glad that we had those
two extra days--the only crimes you are sorry for in the Army are the
ones that are found out. Several times after this we took "French
leave" and went up to London, and then we had our work cut out dodging
the military police. Sometimes we were caught and then we had to pass
a day or two in "Clink"--or, in other words, guard-room. We had
bathing parade once or twice a week, and we would all go down and have
a swim in the sea. Oh, it was great sport, and we were surprised to
find it so easy to swim in the salt water. The country around our camp
was very hilly and most of our route marches were made with full kit,
so a long route march was anything but fun. Our two Americans took a
delight in guying Bob about his love for scenery--poor old Bob would be
sweating along under his heavy pack and one of the boys would