of genial and benevolent feeling. The mask
cannot be so fitted to the face as not to betray its seams and sutures.
Yet kindness is not of itself politeness. Its spontaneous expressions may
be rude and awkward; or they may take forms not readily understood and
appreciated. There are conventional modes of polite demeanor no less than
of courteous speech. These modes may have no intrinsic fitness, yet they
acquire a fitness from their long and general use; and while the mere
repetition of stereotyped formulas whether in word or deportment is justly
offensive, he who would have his politeness recognized and enjoyed must
beware lest he depart too widely from the established sign-language of
society. There is a _brusquerie_ often underlying hearty kindness and good
fellowship, which at the outset pains, wounds, and repels those brought
within its sphere, and which the most intimate friends endure and excuse
rather than approve.

*Politeness is to be regarded as an indispensable duty.* It is believed
that from its neglect or violation more discomfort ensues than from any
other single cause, and in some circles and conditions of society more
than from all other causes combined. There are neighborhoods and
communities that are seldom disturbed by grave offences against the
criminal law, but none which can insure itself against the affronts,
enmities, wounded sensibilities, rankling grievances, occasioned by
incivility and rudeness. Moreover, there are persons entirely free from
vice, perhaps ostentatious in the qualities which are the opposites of
vices, and not deficient in charitable labors and gifts, who cultivate
discourtesy, are acrid or bitter in their very deeds of charity, and carry
into every society a certain porcupine selfhood, which makes their mere
presence annoying and baneful. Such persons, besides the suffering they
inflict on individuals, are of unspeakable injury to their respective
circles or communities, by making their very virtues unlovely, and piety,
if they profess it, hateful. On the other hand, there is no truer
benefactor to society--if the creation of happiness be the measure of
benefit--than the genuine gentleman or gentlewoman, who adds grace to
virtue, politeness to kindness; who under the guidance of a sincere
fellow-feeling, studies the fitnesses of speech and manner, in civility
and courtesy endeavors to render to all their due, and in the least
details that can affect another's happiness, does