was
raised a Presbyterian, you know,--regular black-and-blue Calvinist,--and
what a fellow takes in with his mother's milk sticks by him. I'm
attached to the old ideas,--infant damnation, and total depravity, and
infernal punishment, and the interference of the saints. You fellows
over at the Swamp are loose! Why, by--the way, my mother used to say to
me, in her delicate, squeaky voice: 'Robert, beware of Methodists;
they're loose, my son, loose as a bag of bones.' No, indeed, I wouldn't
want you to think me indifferent to religion; religion's my forte. Why,
by--and by, I mean to start a Presbyterian church right here under your
nose."
"I'm glad of it," responded the minister warmly; "you've no idea how
glad I am, Jarvis."
"Why, man alive, that church is in my mind day and night. I want to get
about forty good, pious Presbyterian families to settle around here, and
I'll bore wells for 'em, and talk up the church business between times.
You saw me carrying that lady's pitcher for her this morning, didn't
you? Well, by--the way, that was a religious move entirely. I took her
man for a Presbyterian preacher the minute I struck the ranch; maybe
it's poor health gives him that cadaverous look, but you can't most
always tell. More likely it's religion. At any rate"--
Esculapius retreated in wild disorder, and did not appear again until
supper-time. When that meal was finished, Colonel Jarvis followed me as
I walked to the piazza.
"If it ain't presuming, madam," he said confidentially, "I'd like to ask
your advice. I take it you're from the city, now?"
"Yes," I answered, with preternatural gravity; "what makes you think
so?"
"Well, I knew it by your gait, mostly. A woman that's raised in the
country walks as if she was used to havin' the road to herself; city
women are generally good steppers. But that ain't the point. I'm engaged
to be married!"
My composure under this announcement was a good deal heightened by the
fact that Esculapius, who had sauntered out after us, whistling to
himself, became suddenly quiet, and disappeared tumultuously.
"Engaged to be married!" I said. "Let me congratulate you, Colonel. May
I hope to see the fortunate young lady?"
"That depends. You see, I'm in a row,--the biggest kind of a row, by--a
good deal; and I thought you might give me a lift. She's a 'Frisco lady,
you know; one of your regular high-flyers; black eyes, bangs, no end o'
spirit. You see, she was visitin' over
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