nd I know
that she hasn't a word to say for herself. Do you mean to come and
see me? I expect to hear from you, letting me know when you will
come. I do not intend to be thrown over for her or anyone. I
believe it is mostly Adelaide's doing, who doesn't like to think
that you should really care for anyone. You know very well what my
feelings are, and what sacrifice I am ready to make. And you know
what you have told me of yourself. I shall be at home all this
afternoon. Papa, of course, will go to his club at three. Aunt
Julia has an afternoon meeting at the Institute for the
distribution of prizes among the Rights-of-Women young men, and I
have told her positively that I won't go. Nobody else will be
admitted. Do come and at any rate let us have it out. This state
of things will kill me,--though, of course, you don't mind that.

"G.

"I shall think you a coward if you don't come. Oh, Jack, do come."

She had begun like a lion, but had ended like a lamb; and such was the
nature of every thought she had respecting him. She was full of
indignation. She assured herself hourly that such treachery as his
deserved death. She longed for a return of the old times,--thirty years
since,--and for some old-fashioned brother, so that Jack might be shot
at and have a pistol bullet in his heart. And yet she told herself as
often that she could not live without him. Where should she find
another Jack after her recklessness in letting all the world know that
this man was her Jack? She hardly wanted to marry him, knowing full
well the nature of the life which would then be before her. Jack had
told her often that if forced to do that he must give up the army and
go and live in ----, he had named Dantzic as having the least alluring
sound of any place he knew. To her it would be best that things should
go on just as they were now till something should turn up. But that she
should be enthralled and Jack free was not to be borne! She begrudged
him no other pleasure. She was willing that he should hunt, gamble,
eat, drink, smoke, and be ever so wicked, if that were his taste; but
not that he should be seen making himself agreeable to another young
woman. It might be that their position was unfortunate, but of that
misfortune she had by far the heavier share. She could not eat, drink,
smoke, gamble, hunt, and be generally wicked. Surely he might bear it
if she could