at many persons are not allowed the privilege, a great many
are allowed it through increasing infirmities or extreme old age; but
every one, I conceive, if allowed to choose, would think it a privilege
to be allowed it, though a great many would find it difficult to
determine _when_ was the fit time. But let us consider what is the
reason of this so natural a wish. I fear that it is often not a
religious wish, often only partially religious. I fear a great number
of persons who aim at retiring from the world's business, do so under
the notion of their then enjoying themselves somewhat after the manner
of the rich man in the Gospel, who said, "Soul, thou hast much goods
laid up for many years." If this is the predominant aim of any one, of
course I need not say that it is a fatal sin, for Christ Himself has
said so. Others there are who are actuated by a mixed feeling; they
are aware that they do not give so much time to religion as they ought;
they do not live by rule; nay, they are not satisfied with the
correctness or uprightness of some of the practices or customs which
their way of life requires of them, and they get tired of active
business as life goes on, and wish to be at ease. So they look to
their last years as a time of retirement, in which they may _both_
enjoy themselves _and_ prepare for heaven. And thus they satisfy both
their conscience and their love of the world. At present religion is
irksome to them; but then, as they hope, duty and pleasure will go
together. Now, putting aside all other mistakes which such a frame of
mind evidences, let it be observed, that if they are at present _not_
serving God with all their hearts, but look forward to a time when they
shall do so, then it is plain that, when at length they _do_ put aside
worldly cares and turn to God, if ever they do, that time must
necessarily be a time of deep humiliation, if it is to be acceptable to
Him, not a comfortable retirement. Who ever heard of a pleasurable,
easy, joyous repentance? It is a contradiction in terms. These men,
if they do but reflect a moment, must confess that their present mode
of life, supposing it be not so strict as it should be, is heaping up
tears and groans for their last years, not enjoyment. The longer they
live as they do at present, not only the more unlikely is it that they
will repent at all; but even if they do, the more bitter, the more
painful must their repentance be. The only way to escap