art of bearing with disagreeable
people and things, the art of behaving to them so as not to offend any
one, of being able to choose the least offense. And this is the hardest
work of all--work that never ceases from the time you wake till the time
you go to sleep, and the most joyful work of all, because day after day
you rejoice in your growing success in it, and receive a further reward,
unperceived at first, but very joyful after, in being loved by others.
So I advise you, Friend Ilya, and both of you, to live and to think as
sincerely as you can, because it is the only way you can discover if
you are really going along the same road, and whether it is wise to
join hands or not; and at the same time, if you are sincere, you must be
making your future ready.
Your purpose in life must not be the joy of wedlock, but, by your life
to bring more love and truth into the world. The object of marriage is
to help one another in the attainment of that purpose.
The vilest and most selfish life is the life of the people who have
joined together only in order to enjoy life; and the highest vocation
in the world is that of those who live in order to serve God by bringing
good into the world, and who have joined together for that very purpose.
Don't mistake half-measures for the real thing. Why should a man not
choose the highest? Only when you have chosen the highest, you must set
your whole heart on it, and not just a little. Just a little leads to
nothing. There, I am tired of writing, and still have much left that I
wanted to say. I kiss you.
HELP FOR THE FAMINE-STRICKEN
AFTER my father had come to the conclusion that it was not only useless
to help people with money, but immoral, the part he took in distributing
food among the peasants during the famines of 1890, 1891, and 1898 may
seem to have shown inconsistency and contradiction of thought.
"If a horseman sees that his horse is tired out, he must not remain
seated on its back and hold up its head, but simply get off," he used to
say, condemning all the charities of the well-fed people who sit on the
back of the working classes, continue to enjoy all the benefits of their
privileged position, and merely give from their superfluity.
He did not believe in the good of such charity and considered it a
form of self-hallucination, all the more harmful because people thereby
acquire a sort of moral right to continue that idle, aristocratic life
and get to go o
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