de holy day;
sayd some sisters nev' did wash de po' little tricks' shirts, jes' taken
a new flour-sack an' cut holes in it. She talked like dat ontwel it be'n
right ondecent and onchristian; an' one sister dat's subjec' to fits
providenchelly done t'rowed one an' bruk up de meetin'. But we-all
sorter done spunk up on de Fif' Commandmint; looked lak _hit_ be'n sho'
harmliss; an' we done fotch de chillen to learn deir juty to deir
parents. Well, dey sho' _got_ it! But den she done scorched de parents
mightily 'bout de 'zample dey be'n bleeged to set de chillen. Dat ar
be'n a fearful, sufferin' hour, an' I nev' did see dis yere congregation
so dry an' havin' to git out de pump so often. Dey went by whole
famblies; an' befo' she be'n frow mighty nigh ever' las' chil' b'en
taken outside. We didn't _dast_ let 'em see frow it." (Groans all over
the house.) "She nigh bust de chu'ch on de Sixth Commandmint wid
outrageous rema'ks on _razors_. An' nex' Sunday comes de Seventh
Commandmint, an' we ain't nowise willin to enjure her handlin' of _dat_,
nohow." (Deep groans of assent from brothers and sisters alike.) "Nor de
Eight', neider." ("No, _no_!" from the seat of Uncle Alexander Pope.)
"Wust is, de ongodly outside, de Methodists an' de cullud folks from de
Ridge, is fixin' to come over an' see we-all ripped up. De chu'ch house
be'n plumb full ever' Sabbath, an' we-all don' dast stay 'way, not
knowin' what scandillous stories will be circulated." ("Dat's so!"
"Holp, Lord!" from earnest souls in the audience.) "An' de chu'ch is
losin' of members. Bruddah Dan Williams done moved away." ("No, sah, no,
he ain't; he b'en sent to de pen!") "I didn't say how come he moved,
Brudder Carroll; he are _gone_. Unc' Jim Hollis done 'bandon his crop.
Aunt Caledonia Ray lef' las' week 'count of injur'us reflections 'bout a
mince pie she done mix up by mistake wid de week's wash she taken fum de
big house. We done pled wid Sist' Humphreys to quit; but she won't quit.
Now de question am: How shill we git saved f'om Sist' Humphreys an' git
a preacher will preach religion--_an' nuffin else_?"

Amid a deep hum of applause Brother Morrow sat down. Half a dozen voices
begged for attention; but the chair recognized Sister Susannah Belle
Coffin. Sister Susannah was of exceeding comeliness and a light-brown
complexion. If report spake truly, there was no one in Zion who had more
reason to dread a fearless and minute exposition of the demands of the
Sevent