hard in the Elrod family as far back as
you could track 'em; all of 'em good, steady, God-fearin' men till
Dick come along. He was an only child, and of course that made a bad
matter worse.
"There's some men that's born to git women into trouble, and Dick was
one of 'em. Jest as handsome as a picture, and two years ahead o' his
age when it come to size, and a way about him, from the time he put on
pants, that showed jest what kind of a man he was cut out for. If the
children was playin' 'Jinny, Put the Kittle on,' Dick would git
kissed ten times to any other boy's once; and if it was 'Drop the
Handkerchief,' every little gyirl in the ring'd be droppin' it behind
Dick to git him to run after her, and that was the only time Dick ever
did any runnin'. All he had to do was jest to sit still, and the
gyirls did the runnin'. It was that way all his life; and folks used
to say there was jest one woman in the world that Dick couldn't make a
fool of, and that was his cousin Penelope, the old Squire's brother's
child. She used to come down to the Squire's pretty near every summer,
and when Dick saw how high and mighty she was, he begun to lay himself
out to make her come down jest where the other women was, not because
he keered anything for her,--such men never keer for anybody but
theirselves,--he jest couldn't stand it to have a woman around unless
she was throwin' herself at his head or at his feet. But he couldn't
do anything with his cousin Penelope. She naturally despised him, and
he hated her. Next to Miss Penelope, the only girl that appeared to be
anything like a match for Dick was Annie Crawford, Old Man Bob
Crawford's daughter. Old Man Bob was one o' the kind that thinks that
the more children they've got the bigger men they are. Always made me
think of Abraham and the rest o' the old patriarchs to see him come
walkin' into church with them nine young ones at his heels, makin' so
much racket you couldn't hear the sermon. He was mighty proud of his
sons; but after Bob was born he wanted a daughter; and when they all
kept turnin' out boys, he got crazier and crazier for a gyirl. Annie
wasn't born till he was past sixty, and he like to 'a' lost his senses
with joy. It was harvestin' time, and he jest stopped work and set on
his front porch, and every time anybody passed by he'd holler, 'Well;
neighbor, it's a gal this time!' If I'd 'a' been in Ann 'Liza's place,
I'd 'a' gagged him. But la! she thought everything he did
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