er,
but now that the time had come he knew that he had not earned the right;
that she trusted him so was all her own simple goodness, and no virtue
of his. But he was resolved that she should never find this out, and so
was always on the watch to see that he did not betray any of his ugly
self; he would take care even in little matters, such as his manners,
and his habit of swearing when things went wrong. The tears came so
easily into Ona's eyes, and she would look at him so appealingly--it
kept Jurgis quite busy making resolutions, in addition to all the other
things he had on his mind. It was true that more things were going on at
this time in the mind of Jurgis than ever had in all his life before.
He had to protect her, to do battle for her against the horror he saw
about them. He was all that she had to look to, and if he failed she
would be lost; he would wrap his arms about her, and try to hide her
from the world. He had learned the ways of things about him now. It was
a war of each against all, and the devil take the hindmost. You did not
give feasts to other people, you waited for them to give feasts to
you. You went about with your soul full of suspicion and hatred; you
understood that you were environed by hostile powers that were trying to
get your money, and who used all the virtues to bait their traps with.
The store-keepers plastered up their windows with all sorts of lies to
entice you; the very fences by the wayside, the lampposts and telegraph
poles, were pasted over with lies. The great corporation which employed
you lied to you, and lied to the whole country--from top to bottom it
was nothing but one gigantic lie.
So Jurgis said that he understood it; and yet it was really pitiful, for
the struggle was so unfair--some had so much the advantage! Here he was,
for instance, vowing upon his knees that he would save Ona from harm,
and only a week later she was suffering atrociously, and from the blow
of an enemy that he could not possibly have thwarted. There came a day
when the rain fell in torrents; and it being December, to be wet with it
and have to sit all day long in one of the cold cellars of Brown's was
no laughing matter. Ona was a working girl, and did not own waterproofs
and such things, and so Jurgis took her and put her on the streetcar.
Now it chanced that this car line was owned by gentlemen who were trying
to make money. And the city having passed an ordinance requiring them to
give tr
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