paid w'en you attends
a board-meetin' to grin an' do nuffin.'

"`Come, come, boy,' said Sir Richard, gettin' redder in the face than I
ever before saw him, `I am not accustomed to low pleasantry, and--'

"`An' I ain't accustomed,' broke in the boy, `to 'igh hinsults. Do you
think that every gent what years a coat an' pants with 'oles in 'em is a
beggar?'

"For some moments master seemed to be struck speechless, an' I feared
that in spite of his well-known gentleness of character he'd throw the
ink-stand at the boy's head, but he didn't; he merely said in a low
voice, `I would dismiss you at once, boy, were it not that I have
promised my daughter to offer you employment, and you can see by her
looks how much your unnatural conduct grieves her.'

"An' this was true, for poor Miss Di sat there with her hands clasped,
her eyes full of tears, her eyebrows disappearin' among her hair with
astonishment, and her whole appearance the very pictur' of distress.
`However,' continued Sir Richard, `I still make you the offer, though I
doubt much whether you will be able to retain the situation. Your wages
will--'

"`Please sir,' pleaded the boy, `don't mention the wages. I couldn't
stand that. Indeed I couldn't; it would really be too much for me.'

"`Why, what do you mean?' says master.

"`I mean,' says Impudence, `that I agree with you. I don't think I
_could_ retain the sitivation, cause w'y? In the fust place, I ain't
got no talent at gardenin'. The on'y time I tried it was w'en I planted
a toolip in a flower-pot, an' w'en I dug it up to see 'ow it was
a-gittin on a cove told me I'd planted it upside down. However, I
wasn't goin' to be beat by that cove, so I say to 'im, Jack, I says, I
planted it so a purpus, an' w'en it sprouts I'm a-goin' to 'ang it up to
see if it won't grow through the 'ole in the bottom. In the second
place, I couldn't retain the sitivation 'cause I don't intend to take
it, though you was to offer me six thousand no shillin's an' no pence no
farthin's a year as salary.'

"I r'ally did think master would ha' dropt out of his chair at that. As
for Miss Di, she was so tickled that she gave a sort of hysterical
laugh.

"`Balls,' said master, `show him out, and--' he pulled up short, but I
knew he meant to say have an eye on the great-coats and umbrellas, so I
showed the boy out, an' he went down-stairs, quite quiet, but the last
thing I saw of him was performin' a sort of minstrel dance at