l in the letter, and to let her
think that it was as though I were writing as an interested friend to
another who scarcely knew what to do in a momentous time. Her father's
letter I passed entirely over. He never knew, nor does Barbara know to
this day, that I received it.

Yet that night, when I sat with friend Jordan in the hallway of friend
Afton's house, my mind seemed confused and full of uncertainty. I scarcely
noted the name which friend Hicks told me belonged to the man he had seen
his daughter walking with, and not until friend Afton called to the other
woman that she should retire for the night did the similarity of the names
bear upon me. The hireling minister was named Jordan, the demented woman's
name was Jordan: it might be a casual coincidence, but the man seemed
taking all away from me that had made my life pleasant and hopeful, while
the woman said I gave her new life, new hope, and all that life and hope
consisted of--a healthful belief in the Lord and His works--although I
knew that while she said so her lost mind was perhaps only being
influenced by a quiet and moderate one. Yet maybe there are moments of
what is called delusion which are the most sane constituents of a
lifetime. As it was, late in the night, as I lay awake and sore in spirit,
and wild with all things and almost with the Lord, sleepless and with
much yearning grown upon me, I heard the voice calling out in the night up
to the stars and the mystery of quiet for love and all that had been near
and dear to this one clouded mind; and I turned my face to the wall. And I
was like Ishmael indeed when I remembered, while that voice threw out its
plaint and the words were clear and cleaved the darkness, that when I had
last parted with Barbara, when I hurried from her presence fearful to look
back lest she might call me from manly order by a look or a smile, I had
thrown myself against a man outside the garden-gate, the man with a white
neckcloth and long black ill-cut coat, who had told me that he was the
minister of the church but newly erected, and that I had bidden peace go
with him, and he had bidden it back to me.

III.

I bethink me that I was very much perturbed in my mind after this, albeit
I was exteriorly the quiet, drab-colored Quaker that all knew me to be.
Still, I have failed yet to ascertain what discipline that can govern
actions, looks and speech can make man's heart throb more sluggishly than
the feelings to which all N