rought out; if you
have not, you must submit to his contemptuous pity for your ignorance.
For a person who passes his evenings in the society of books and
friends, or in the country, the stage-struck gentleman has the most
profound contempt. How one can live without nightly inhaling the odor
of gas and orange peel, is to him a mystery inexplicable. He is aided
and abetted in his practices by the sympathy and example of other
stage-struck youths, all "foredoomed their fathers' soul to cross,"
all loathing their daily avocations for the time being, all spending
their earnings, or borrowings, or stealings, on bits of pasteboard
that admit them to their nightly banquet. The stage struck always copy
the traits of the leading actor of the hour, whoever he may be, and
grunt and bluster in imitation of "Ned"--meaning Forrest--or quack and
stutter _a la_ "Bill"--that is, Macready--as the wind of popular favor
veers and changes. It is curious, at a representation of the
"Gladiator," to winnow these young gentlemen from the mass by the lens
of an opera glass. There you may see the knit brows, the high shirt
collars, the folded arms, the pursed-up lips, the hats drawn down over
the eyes, that are the certain indications of the stage-struck
Forrestians.

If, after the performance, fate and a designing oysterman place you in
the next box to three or four of these geniuses, you will, unless very
much of a philosopher, be disgusted, for the time being, with human
nature. Their paltry imitations, their miserable brayings, their
misquotations from Shakspeare, their mendacious accounts of interviews
with the "Boy," will be enough to drive you mad. Some such thing as
the following will occur:--

_Waiter._ Here are your oysters, _gentlemen_; ("a slight shade of
irony in the emphasis.")

_Stage-struck Youth, No. 1_, (in a deep guttural tone.) "Let em come
in--we're armed!"

_Stage-struck Youth, No. 2_, (to waiter.) "Red ruffian, retire!"

_Stage-struck Youth, No. 3_, (to Stage-struck Youth, No. 4.) "How are
you _now_, Dick?"

_Stage-struck Youth, No. 4._ "Richard's himself again!"

_O, Dii immortales!_ can these things be? In other words, _can_ such
_animals_ exist?

It has been calculated by a celebrated mathematician, that out of
every fourteen dozen of these stage-struck young gentlemen, one
actually makes a first appearance. This event causes an enormous
flutter in the circle of aspirants from which the promotion takes
place.