on the ship the other day, we all agreed that the
heavy hand was the only way to deal with women; but it seemed on
investigation that no one had actually tried it the reason being
apparently a well-grounded fear that our wives wouldn't like it.

[Sidenote: Danger, but little action or variety.]

This war hasn't had as much action, variety, and stimulation for us as I
would like. Danger there always is, but being little in evidence, you
have to prod your nerves to realize it rather than soothe them down.
Lately, however, things have changed in a manner which, though involving
no more danger, furnishes a somewhat greater mental stimulation, and
thence is better for everybody. I regret to say that I am gaining in
weight. It was my hope to come back thin and gaunt and
interesting-looking. Instead of which, you will likely be mad as a
hornet to find me so sleek, while you at home have done all the thinning
down. Truth to tell, if you compare our relative peace and war status,
you are much more at war than I am.

[Sidenote: The highest form of courage.]

If you find son timid in some things, just remember that I was, too.
Lots of things he will change about automatically. At his age I had
small love for fire-crackers or explosives of any kind, but in two or
three years, and without any prompting, I became really expert in guns
and gunpowder. Try to get him to realize that the very highest form of
courage is to be afraid to do a thing--and do it!

AUGUST 3.

[Sidenote: U-boat score against destroyers is zero.]

Once in a while some one of us gets a torpedo fired at him, and only
luck or quick seamanship saves him from destruction. Some day the
torpedo will hit, and then the Navy Department will "regret to report."
But the laws of probability and chance cannot lie, and as the total
U-boat score against our destroyers so far is zero, you can figure for
yourself that they will have to improve somewhat before the Kaiser can
hand out many iron crosses at our expense.

[Sidenote: Picking up survivors.]

We had a new experience the other day when we picked up two boatloads of
survivors from the ----, torpedoed without warning. I will say they were
pretty glad to see us when we bore down on them. As we neared, they
began to paddle frantically, as though fearful we should be snatched
away from them at the last moment. The crew were mostly Arabs and
Lascars, and the first mate, a typical comic-magazine Irishman,
delivered