said I, "but here is half-a-crown, and you can change it and
bring me back the eighteen pence."

"Well, you are a nice young man," replied she, taking the half-crown;
"I'll be back directly, my dear."

The men in the boat laughed, and the coxswain desired them to shove off.

"No," observed I, "you must wait for my eighteen pence."

"We shall wait a devilish long while then, I suspect. I know that girl,
and she has a very bad memory."

"She cannot be so dishonest or ungrateful," replied I. "Coxswain, I
order you to stay--I am an officer."

"I know you are, sir, about six hours old: well, then, I must go up and
tell the captain that you have another girl in tow, and that you won't
go on board."

"Oh no, Mr Coxswain, pray don't; shove off as soon as you please, and
never mind the eighteen pence."

The boat then shoved off, and pulled towards the ship, which lay at
Spithead.

Chapter V

I am introduced to the quarter-deck and first lieutenant, who pronounces
me very clever--Trotted below to Mrs Trotter--Connubial bliss in a
cock-pit--Mr Trotter takes me in as a mess-mate--Feel very much
surprised that so many people know that I am the son of--my father.

On our arrival on board, the coxswain gave a note from the captain to
the first lieutenant, who happened to be on deck. He read the note,
looked at me earnestly, and then I overheard him say to another
lieutenant, "The service is going to the devil. As long as it was not
popular, if we had not much education, we at least had the chance that
natural abilities gave us; but now that great people send their sons for
a provision into the navy, we have all the refuse of their families, as
if anything was good enough to make a captain of a man-of-war, who has
occasionally more responsibility on his shoulders, and is placed in
situations requiring more judgment, than any other people in existence.
Here's another of the fools of a family made a present of to the
country--another cub for me to lick into shape. Well, I never saw the
one yet I did not make something of. Where's Mr Simple?"

"I am Mr Simple, sir," replied I, very much frightened at what I had
overheard.

"Now, Mr Simple," said the first lieutenant, "observe, and pay
particular attention to what I say. The captain tells me in this note
that you have been shamming stupid. Now, sir, I am not to be taken in
that way. You're something like the monkeys, who won't speak because
they are afraid they wi