doors. The sound of
applause is heard.]
POULDER. [Discreetly] would you care to see the bomb, my lady?
LADY W. Of course--first quiet moment.
POULDER. I'll bring it up, and have a watch put on it here, my lady.
[LORD WILLIAM comes through the double doom followed by JAMES.
POULDER retires.]
LORD W. Can't you come, Nell?
LADY W. Oh! Bill, your Dad wants to speak.
LORD W. The deuce he does--that's bad.
LADY W. Yes, of course, but you must let him; he's found something
he said in 1914.
LORD W. I knew it. That's what they'll say. Standing stock still,
while hell's on the jump around us.
LADY W. Never mind that; it'll please him; and he's got a lovely
little sweated toy that turns head over heels at one penny.
LORD W. H'm! Well, come on.
LADY W. No, I must wait for stragglers. There's sure to be an
editor in a hurry.
POULDER. [Announcing] Mis-ter Gold-rum!
LADY W. [Sotto voce] And there he is! [She advances to meet a thin,
straggling man in eyeglasses, who is smiling absently] How good of
you!
MR. G. Thanks awfully. I just er--and then I'm afraid I must--er--
Things look very----Thanks----Thanks so much.
[He straggles through the doors, and is enclosed by JAMES.]
POULDER. Miss Mun-day.
LORD W. There! I thought she was in--She really is the most
unexpected woman! How do you do? How awfully sweet of you!
MISS M. [An elderly female schoolboy] How do you do? There's a
spiffing crowd. I believe things are really going Bolshy. How do
you do, Lord William? Have you got any of our people to show? I
told one or two, in case--they do so simply love an outing.
JAMES. There are three old chips in the lobby, my Lord.
LORD W. What? Oh! I say! Bring them in at once. Why--they're the
hub of the whole thing.
JAMES. [Going] Very good, my Lord.
LADY W. I am sorry. I'd no notion; and they're such dears always.
MISS M. I must tell you what one of them said to me. I'd told him
not to use such bad language to his wife. "Don't you worry, Ma!" he
said, "I expert you can do a bit of that yourself!"
LADY W. How awfully nice! It's SO like them.
MISS M. Yes. They're wonderful.
LORD W. I say, why do we always call them they?
LADY W. [Puzzled] Well, why not?
LORD W. THEY!
MISS M. [Struck] Quite right, Lord William! Quite right! Another
species. They! I must remember that. THEY! [She passes on.]
LADY
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