, staggering
from door to door and from port to port, and land ultimately in the
big Bears' den, who hugged and squeezed him inhumanly there. Once at
Wusterhausen, staggering blind-drunk out of the Schloss towards his
lair, the sentries at the Bridge (instigated to it by the Houyhnhnms,
who look on) pretend to fasten some military blame on him: Why has
he omitted or committed so-and-so? Gundling's drunk answer is
unsatisfactory. "Arrest, Herr Kammerrath, is it to be that, then!" They
hustle him about, among the Bears which lodge there;--at length they
lay him horizontally across two ropes;--take to swinging him hither and
thither, up and down, across the black Acherontic Ditch, which is frozen
over, it being the dead of winter: one of the ropes, LOWER rope, breaks;
Gundling comes souse upon the ice with his sitting-part; breaks a big
hole in the ice, and scarcely with legs, arms and the remaining rope,
can be got out undrowned. [Forster (i. 254-280); founding, I suppose,
on _Leben und Thaten des Freiherrn Paul von Gundling_ (Berlin, 1795);
probably not one of the exactest Biographies.]

If, with natural indignation, he shut his door, and refuse to come to
the Tabagie, they knock in a panel of his door; and force him out with
crackers, fire-works, rockets and malodorous projectiles. Once the poor
blockhead, becoming human for a moment, went clean away; to Halle where
his Brother was, or to some safer place: but the due inveiglements,
sublime apologies, increase of titles, salaries, were used; and the
indispensable Phosphorescent Blockhead, and President of the Academy of
Pedler's-French, was got back. Drink remained always as his consolation;
drink, and the deathless Volumes he was writing and printing. Sublime
returns came to him;--Kaiser's Portrait set in diamonds, on one
occasion,--for his Presentation-Copies in high quarters: immortal fame,
is it not his clear portion; still more clearly abundance of good wine.
Friedrich Wilhelm did not let him want for Titles;--raised him at last
to the Peerage; drawing out the Diploma and Armorial Blazonry, in a
truly Friedrich-Wilhelm manner, with his own hand. The Gundlings,
in virtue of the transcendent intellect and merits of this Founder
Gundling, are, and are hereby declared to be, of Baronial dignity to the
last scion of them; and in "all RITTER-RENNEN (Tournaments), Battles,
Fights, Camp-pitchings, Sealings, Sightings, shall and may use the
above-said Shield of Arms,"--if i