But I gave even them up. And
look at me."

The man was arrogant, and rightly arrogant, with conscious well-being.
And within a month he was dead. It was no accident. Half a dozen
different bugs of long scientific names had attacked and destroyed him.
The complications were astonishing and painful, and for days before he
died the screams of agony of that splendid manhood could be heard for a
block around. He died screaming.

"You see," said John Barleycorn. "He took care of himself. He even
stopped smoking cigars. And that's what he got for it. Pretty rotten,
eh? But the bugs will jump. There's no forefending them. Your
magnificent doctor took every precaution, yet they got him. When the bug
jumps you can't tell where it will land. It may be you. Look what he
missed. Will you miss all I can give you, only to have a bug jump on you
and drag you down? There is no equity in life. It's all a lottery. But
I put the lying smile on the face of life and laugh at the facts. Smile
with me and laugh. You'll get yours in the end, but in the meantime
laugh. It's a pretty dark world. I illuminate it for you. It's a
rotten world, when things can happen such as happened to your doctor.
There's only one thing to do: take another drink and forget it."

And, of course, I took another drink for the inhibition that accompanied
it. I took another drink every time John Barleycorn reminded me of what
had happened. Yet I drank rationally, intelligently. I saw to it that
the quality of the stuff was of the best. I sought the kick and the
inhibition, and avoided the penalties of poor quality and of drunkenness.
It is to be remarked, in passing, that when a man begins to drink
rationally and intelligently that he betrays a grave symptom of how far
along the road he has travelled.

But I continued to observe my rule of never taking my first drink of the
day until the last word of my thousand words was written. On occasion,
however, I took a day's vacation from my writing. At such times, since
it was no violation of my rule, I didn't mind how early in the day I took
that first drink. And persons who have never been through the drinking
game wonder how the drinking habit grows!

CHAPTER XXXII

When the Snark sailed on her long cruise from San Francisco there was
nothing to drink on board. Or, rather, we were all of us unaware that
there was anything to drink, nor did we discover it for many a month.
This sai