centric artist with five hundred pounds
in his pocket; why it must prove his death-warrant, unless immediate
measures are taken to free him from its magical influence. Shall I
embark it in some of the new speculations? the Milk company, or
the Water company, the Flesh, Fish, or Fowl companies, railways or
tunnel-ways, or in short, only put me in the right way, for, at present,
I am mightily abroad in that respect." "Then my advice is, that you keep
your money at home, or in other words, fund it; unless you wish to be
made fun of and laughed at for a milksop, or a bubble merchant, or be
taken for one of the Gudgeon family, or a chicken butcher, a member
of the Poultry company, where fowl dealing is considered all fair; or
become a liveryman of the worshipful company of minors (i.e. miners),
where you may be fleeced a la Hayne, by legs, lawyers, bankers and
brokers, demireps and contractors'; or, perhaps, you ~113~~will
feel disposed to embark in a new company, of which I have just strung
together a prospectus in rhyme: a speculation which has, at least, much
of novelty in this country to recommend it, and equally interests all
orders of society.

1 It is not surprising, we see, that lawyers, bankers, and
brokers are found at the bottom of most of the new schemes.
Their profits are certain, whatever the fate of the Gudgeon
family. The brokers, in particular, have a fine harvest of
it. Their charges being upon the full nominal amount of the
shares sold, they get twice as much by transferring a single
100L. share in a speculation, although only 1L. may have
been paid on it, as by the purchase or sale of 100L.
consols, of which the price is 94L. Or, to make the matter
plainer to the uninitiated, suppose an individual wishes to
lay out 500L. in the stock-market. If he orders his broker
to purchase into the British funds, the latter will buy him
about 535L. three per cent, consols; and the
brokerage, at one-eighth per cent, will be about 13s. But
if the same person desires to invest the same sum in the
stock of a new Mine or Rail-road company, which is divided
into 100L. shares, on each of which say 1L. is paid, and
there is a premium of 1L. (as is the case at this moment
with a stock we have in our eye) his broker's account will
then stand thus:--

Bought 250 shares in the ---- Company.

First instalme