* * * * *

IN MEMORIAM.--As a tribute expressive of the high estimation in which
the late Mr. P.T. BARNUM was held in England, why not endow a "Barnum
Exhibition" at one of the Colleges of either University? We have
"Smith's Prizeman," why not "Barnum Exhibitioner"?

* * * * *

"THE PRODIGY SON."--The three-act pantomime play at the Prince of
Wales's has "caught on," as we predicted it would. Manager SEDGER
thinks of temporarily adopting as his motto for this theatre, "Speech
is silvern, silence is golden."

* * * * *

[Illustration: THE RAIKES' PROGRESS.]

* * * * *

SWORD VERSUS LANCET!

(_AN INCIDENT IN THE NEXT WAR._)

"Now," said the Surgeon-Field-Marshal-Commanding-in-Chief, as he
stood before his men; "I have the greatest confidence in your skill.
There is not one of you present who cannot perform an operation as
successfully as myself;" here there was a murmur of polite denial
in the ranks. "Nay, it is no flattery--I mean it. These are my last
instructions. We are few, the enemy are many. We are not only soldiers
but medical men. And as medical men it is our business to cure the
wounds that we inflict in our more strictly military capacity."

Again there was a murmur--this time of cordial approval.

"Well, Gentlemen, as we have been taught in our drill, what the first
rank breaks, the rear rank must bandage up. This would be all very
well if our numbers were told by thousands, or even hundreds, instead
of tens. But to-day we must use the bayonet rather than the lancet,
the bullet in preference to the pill." Stealthy applause followed this
observation. "But be careful. Common humanity calls upon us to do as
little damage as possible. You know your anatomy sufficiently well to
avoid inflicting a wound upon a vital part, and can so arrange that
your blows shall incapacitate rather than functionally derange. And
now, my friends, put your instrument-boxes and pharmacopoeias in your
haversacks, and draw your swords. All ready? Yes! Then, 'Up, Guards,
and at them!'"

With a wild cheer the Royal Regiment of Physicians and Surgeons (which
had recently been admitted into the Service on the footing of the
Royal Engineers) rushed forward. It was a beautiful sight to see
them performing the most delicate operations in the kindest manner
imaginable. The enemy trembled, wavered, and fled