The Project Gutenberg eBook, Tutt and Mr. Tutt, by Arthur Train

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Title: Tutt and Mr. Tutt

Author: Arthur Train

Release Date: December 12, 2003 [eBook #10440]

Language: English

Character set encoding: US-ASCII

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TUTT AND MR. TUTT

By Arthur Train

1919

CONTENTS

THE HUMAN ELEMENT

MOCK HEN AND MOCK TURTLE

SAMUEL AND DELILAH

THE DOG ANDREW

WILE _Versus_ GUILE

HEPPLEWHITE TRAMP

LALLAPALOOSA LIMITED

The Human Element

Although men flatter themselves with their great actions,
they are not so often the result of great design as of chance.
--LA ROCHEFOUCAULD.

"He says he killed him, and that's all there is about it!" said Tutt to
Mr. Tutt. "What are you going to do with a fellow like that?" The junior
partner of the celebrated firm of Tutt & Tutt, attorneys and counselors
at law, thrust his hands deep into the pockets of his yellow checked
breeches and, balancing himself upon the heels of his patent-leather
boots, gazed in a distressed, respectfully inquiring manner at his
distinguished associate.

"Yes," he repeated plaintively. "He don't make any bones about it at
all. 'Sure, I killed him!' says he. 'And I'd kill him again, the ----!'
I prefer not to quote his exact language. I've just come from the Tombs
and had quite a talk with Serafino in the counsel room, with a
gum-chewing keeper sitting in the corner watching me for fear I'd slip
his prisoner a saw file or a shotgun or a barrel of poison. I'm all in!
These murder cases drive me to drink, Mr. Tutt. I don't mind grand
larceny, forgery, assault or even manslaughter--but murder gets my goat!
And when you have a crazy Italian for a client who says he's glad he did
it and would like to do it again--please excuse me! It isn't law; it's
suicide!"

He drew out a silk handkerchief ornamented with the colors of the
Allies, and wiped his forehead despairingly.

"Oh," remarked Mr. Tutt with entire good nature. "He's glad he did it
and he's quite willing to b