So well, I'm 'shamed uv it! Man's more decent if he's a leetle bit
sickly. An' thet there girl Bill's agreed t'marry ye! Why! 'Druther hev
her 'n this hull city o' New York.

'So had I,' was my answer.

'Wall, you am'no luckier 'n she is--not a bit,' he added. 'A good man's
better 'n a gol'mine ev'ry time.

'Who knows,' said Hope. 'He may be president someday.

'Ther's one thing I hate,' Uncle El continued. 'That's the idee o hevin'
the woodshed an' barn an' garret full o' them infernal wash bilers.
Ye can't take no decent care uv a hoss there 'n the stable' they're
so piled up. One uv 'em tumbled down top o' me t'other day. 'Druther
'twould a been a panther. Made me s'mad I took a club an' knocked that
biler into a cocked hat. 'Tain't right! I'm sick o' the sight uv 'em.

'They'll make a good bonfire someday,' said Hope.

'Don't believe they'd burn,' he answered sorrowfully, 'they're tin.

'Couldn't we bury 'em?' I suggested.

'Be a purty costly funeral,' he answered thoughtfully. 'Ye'd hev if dig
a hole deeper n Tupper's dingle.

'Couldn't you give them away?' I enquired.

'Wall,' said he, helping himself to a chew of tobacco, 'we ve tried
thet. Gin 'em t'everybody we know but there ain't folks enough' there's
such a slew o'them bilers. We could give one if ev'ry man, woman an'
child in Faraway an' hex enough left t'fill an acre lot. Dan Perry druv
in t'other day with a double buggy. We gin him one fer his own fam'ly.
It was heavy t'carry an' he didn't seem t' like the looks uv it someway.
Then I asked him if he wouldn't like one fer his girl. "She ain't
married," says he. "She will be some time," says I, "take it along," so
he put in another. "You've got a sister over on the turnpike hain't
ye?" says I. "Yes," says he. "Wall," I says, "don' want a hex her feel
slighted." "She won't know 'bout my hevin' 'em," says he, lookin' 's if
he'd hed enough. "Yis she will," I says, "she'll hear uv it an' mebbe
make a fuss." Then we piled in another. "Look here," I says after that,
"there s yer brother Bill up there 'bove you. Take one along fer him."
"No," says he, "I don' tell ev'ry body, but Bill an' I ain't on good
terms. We ain't spoke fer more'n a year."

'Knew he was lyin',' Uncle Eb added with a laugh, 'I'd seen him talkin'
with Bill a day er two before.

'Whew!' he whistled as he looked at his big silver watch. 'I declare
it's mos' one o clock They's jes' one other piece o' business if come
before this mee