wanted to
acquire medical lore rapidly, so I listened to every lecture that I could,
whether it came in my schedule or not. _Soon I began to manifest symptoms
of every disease I heard discussed._ I would one day have all the signs of
pancreatic disease; perhaps the next I would display unmistakable
evidences of ascending myelitis; next, my liver would be the storm center,
and so on. My shifting of symptoms was gauged by the lecturers to whom I
listened.

At my room one evening I was walking the floor wrapped in deepest gloom.
No deep-dyed pessimist ever felt as I did at that moment, for I had just
discovered that I had an incurable heart disease. I had often feared as
much, but now I had it from a scientific source that my heart was going
wrong. I could tell by the way I felt. My room-mate noticed me. He was
another Western bovine-chaser, a good fellow in his way, but according to
my standard, devoid of all the finer qualities that go to make a
gentleman.

"What in thunder's the matter with you, feller?" he blurted out. I told
him of the latest affliction that had beset me. What this fellow said
would not look well in print. My exasperation at his conduct, together
with thoughts of my new disease, caused me to lash the pillow sleeplessly
that night. I decided to go early in the morning and see Dr. Cardack,
professor of chest diseases, and at least have him concur in my
self-diagnosis.

The doctor had not yet arrived at his office. I must have been very early,
for it seemed to me that he would never come. When he did arrive I was
given a very affable greeting but only a superficial examination. I felt a
little hurt to think that he did not seem to regard my case with the
significance which I thought it deserved. The afflicted are always close
observers in whatever concerns themselves. Professor Cardack had a
peculiar smile on his big, kind face when he asked:--

"Have you been listening to my lectures on diseases of the heart?"

"Yes, sir;" was my response.

"Did you hear my lecture on mitral murmurs yesterday?" he asked.

"I did," I had to admit.

"And did you read up on the subject?" was further interrogated.

"Y-yes," and my tones implied a little guilt, although I could not tell
why.

"I thought so," continued the doctor; "some of the boys from our college
were in last night to have their hearts examined, and I am expecting quite
a number in again this evening. Every year when I begin my course of
lectu