'm you
ought rather to send to the workhouse than maintain at your own expense,
did I! _I_ advised you to take him as an apprentice; and, so far from
getting the regular fee with him, to give him a salary? _I_ advised you
to feed him, and clothe him, and treat him like his betters; to put up
with his insolence, and wink at his faults? _I_ counselled all this, I
suppose. You'll tell me next, I dare say, that I recommended you to go
and visit his mother so frequently under the plea of charity; to give
her wine, and provisions, and money; to remove her from the only fit
quarters for such people--the Mint; and to place her in a cottage at
Willesden, of which you must needs pay the rent? Marry, come up! charity
should begin at home. A discreet husband would leave the dispensation of
his bounty, where women are concerned, to his wife. And for my part, if
I were inclined to exercise my benevolence at all, it should be in
favour of some more deserving object than that whining, hypocritical
Magdalene."

"It was the knowledge of this feeling on your part, my love, that made
me act without your express sanction. I did all for the best, I'm sure.
Mrs. Sheppard is--"

"I know what Mrs. Sheppard is, without your information, Sir. I haven't
forgotten her previous history. You've your own reasons, no doubt, for
bringing up her son--perhaps, I ought rather to say _your_ son, Mr.
Wood."

"Really, my love, these accusations are most groundless--this violence
is most unnecessary."

"I can't endure the odious baggage. I hope I may never come near her."

"I hope you never may, my love," humbly acquiesced the carpenter.

"Is my house to be made a receptacle for all your natural children, Sir?
Answer me that."

"Winny," said Thames, whose glowing cheek attested the effect produced
upon him by the insinuation; "Winny," said he, addressing a pretty
little damsel of some twelve years of age, who stood by his side holding
the bottle of embrocation, "help me on with my coat, please. This is no
place for me."

"Sit down, my dear, sit down," interposed Mrs. Wood, softening her
asperity. "What I said about natural children doesn't apply to _you_.
Don't suppose," she added, with a scornful glance at her helpmate,
"that I would pay him the compliment of thinking he could possibly be
the father of such a boy as you."

Mr. Wood lifted up his hands in mute despair.

"Owen, Owen," pursued Mrs. Wood, sinking into a chair, and fanning
herself vi