d, as it had to be, for, as
ye know, it is dry desert about Jerusalem, without lakes or streams. But
he lived there better than he had ever lived before, by talking of our
Lord Jesus Christ, of whom it was no longer a danger to talk, for James
had made his brother acceptable in Jerusalem by lopping from him all
that was Jesus, making him according to his own image; with these
Christians he no longer stood up as an opponent of the law, but as one
who believed in it, who had said: I come not to abolish the law but to
confirm it. So did his brother James interpret Jesus to me who had heard
Jesus speak out of the spirit, and when I answered that he had said too
that he had come to abolish the law, James answered only that his
brother had said many things and that some were not as wise as others.
Peter, who was called upon to testify that Jesus wished the Jews to
remain Jews, and that circumcision and all the observances were needed,
answered that he did not know which was the truth, Jesus not having
spoken plainly on these matters, and neither one nor the other seemed to
understand that it was of no avail that Jesus should have been born,
should have died and been raised from the dead by his Father if the law
were to prevail unchanged for evermore. To James and to Peter Jesus was
a prophet, but no more than the prophets, and unable to understand
either Peter or Jesus, I returned to Tarsus broken-hearted, for there
did not seem to be on earth a true Christian but myself, and I knew not
whom to preach to, Gentiles or Jews. Only of one thing was I sure, that
the Lord Jesus Christ had spoken to me out of the clouds and ordained me
his apostle, but he had not pointed out the way, and I mourned that I
had gone up to Jerusalem, and abode in Tarsus disheartened, resuming my
loom, sitting at it from daylight till dark, waiting for some new sign
to be given me, for I did not lose hope altogether, but, knowing well
that the ways of Providence are not immediate, waited in patience or in
such patience as I might possess myself. Barnabas I had forgotten, and
he was forgotten when I said that I had met none in Jerusalem that could
be said to be a follower of the Master.

It was Barnabas who brought me to James, the brother of the Lord, and to
Peter, and told them that though I had persecuted I was now zealous, and
had preached in many synagogues that Christ Jesus had died and been
raised from the dead. But whether they feared me as a spy,