individual in black was seen to tremble with increased
violence. His eyes rolled more wildly, while his face took on a chalkier
hue. He stepped back, as if to insure his retreat. Then, mustering all
his resolution, he said:

"M-Mrs. M-Mrs. Slapman, you--you ought to be a-ashamed of yourself!"

The real character of the strange actor was now made evident, and the
whole house was hushed in awe and expectation. There was not a man or
woman present but knew too well the folly of mingling in a family
quarrel. So they held their tongues, and enjoyed the scene.

Mrs. Slapman turned to the audience. She was pale, but perfectly
composed. She said:

"Ladies and gentlemen, this is my husband, a very quiet and well-behaved
man, whose only fault is excessive nervousness. This fault, I am sorry
to say, he encourages, by constantly smoking cigars and drinking strong
black tea. He has been indulging in both of these stimulants to-night,
till he is quite beside himself. I trust you will excuse and pity him.
He has no other vices that I know of."

Then, turning to her husband, whose hands had now dropped listlessly by
his side, she added:

"My dear, bathe your head, and go to bed immediately."

He struggled to say something in the presence of this calm embodiment of
satire, but could not. Hanging down his head, and looking very silly, he
slinked off the stage.

"Now, ladies and gentlemen," said Mrs. Slapman, "after an interval of
fifteen minutes, we will proceed with the comedietta of 'A Morning
Call,' as if nothing had happened."

When she had said this, Mrs. Slapman fainted--this time in earnest. She
was caught in the arms of Fayette Overtop, who immediately, and with the
utmost delicacy, resigned her to the arms of Miss Wick (Bidette), and of
several other ladies, who came upon the stage and proffered salts,
cologne, and other restoratives.

The gentlemen present, actors and audience, unanimously decided that the
best thing for them to do, under all the circumstances, was to leave
the premises.

This they did as soon as they could, reserving all discussion of the
painful event of the evening for the free air of the street.

As Overtop, very serious, and Maltboy, very jovial, were about to
descend the steps to the sidewalk, they were met by a messenger, who
desired them to go with him immediately to the station house to see some
friends (names forgotten) who had been arrested, and had sent for them.

Thither they went,