ng
to be got in wrestling with a Chimney-Sweeper,--he was going to take
Leave of Trim for ever.--But, hold,--the Mob by this Time had got round
them, and their High Mightinesses insisted upon having Trim tried upon
the Spot.--Trim was accordingly tried; and, after a full Hearing, was
convicted a second Time, and handled more roughly by one or more of
them, than even at the Parson's.
Trim, says one, are you not ashamed of yourself, to make all this Rout
and Disturbance in the Town, and set Neighbours together by the Ears,
about an old-worn-out-Pair-of-cast-Breeches, not worth Half a Crown?--Is
there a cast-Coat, or a Place in the whole Town, that will bring you in
a Shilling, but what you have snapp'd up, like a greedy Hound as you
are?
In the first Place, are you not Sexton and Dog-Whipper, worth Three
Pounds a Year?--Then you begg'd the Church-Wardens to let your Wife have
the Washing and Darning of the Surplice and Church-Linen, which brings
you in Thirteen Shillings and Four Pence.--Then you have Six Shillings
and Eight Pence for oiling and winding up the Clock, both paid you at
Easter.--The Pinder's Place, which is worth Forty Shillings a Year,--you
have got that too.--You are the Bailiff, which the late Parson got you,
which brings you in Forty Shillings more.--Besides all this, you have
Six Pounds a Year, paid you Quarterly for being Mole-Catcher to the
Parish.--Aye, says the luckless Wight above-mentioned, (who was standing
close to him with his Plush Breeches on) "You are not only Mole-Catcher,
Trim, but you catch STRAY CONIES too in the Dark; and you pretend a
Licence for it, which, I trove, will be look'd into at the next Quarter
Sessions." I maintain it, I have a Licence, says Trim, blushing as red
as Scarlet:--I have a Licence,--and as I farm a Warren in the next
Parish, I will catch Conies every Hour of the Night.--You catch Conies!
cries a toothless old Woman, who was just passing by.--
This set the Mob a laughing, and sent every Man home in perfect good
Humour, except Trim, who waddled very slowly off with that Kind of
inflexible Gravity only to be equalled by one Animal in the whole
Creation,--and surpassed by none, I am,
SIR, Yours, &c. &c.
FINIS.
POSTSCRIPT.
I have broke open my Letter to inform you, that I miss'd the Opportunity
of sending it by the Messenger, who I expected would have called upon me
in his Return through this Village to York, so it has laid a Week or ten
Days by me
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