ouse,
I prays der Lord, "Dake anydings,
But leaf dot Yawcob Strauss."

DOT BABY OF MINE.

BY CHARLES F. ADAMS.

Mine cracious! Mine cracious! shust look here und see
A Deutscher so habby as habby can pe.
Der beoples all dink dat no prains I haf got,
Vas grazy mit trinking, or someding like dot;
Id vasn't pecause I trinks lager und vine,
Id vas all on aggount of dot baby off mine.

Dot schmall leedle vellow I dells you vas qveer;
Not mooch pigger round as a goot glass off beer,
Mit a bare-footed hed, and nose but a schpeck,
A mout dot goes most to der pack of his neck,
And his leedle pink toes mid der rest all combine
To gife sooch a charm to dot baby off mine.

I dells you dot baby vas von off der poys,
Und beats leedle Yawcob for making a noise;
He shust has pegun to shbeak goot English, too,
Says "Mamma," und "Bapa," und somedimes "ah-goo!"
You don't find a baby den dimes oudt off nine
Dot vas qvite so schmart as dot baby off mine.

He grawls der vloor over, und drows dings aboudt,
Und puts efryding he can find in his mout;
He durables der shtairs down, und falls vrom his chair,
Und gifes mine Katrina von derrible schare.
Mine hair stands like shquills on a mat borcupine
Ven I dinks of dose pranks of dot baby off mine.

Der vas someding, you pet, I don't likes pooty veil;
To hear in der nighdt dimes dot young Deutscher yell,
Und dravel der ped-room midout many clo'es,
Vhile der chills down der sphine off mine pack quickly goes.
Dose leedle shimnasdic dricks vasn't so fine
Dot I cuts oop at nighdt mit dot baby off mine.

Veil, dese leedle schafers vos goin' to pe men,
Und all off dese droubles vill peen ofer den;
Dey vill vear a vhite shirt-vront inshted of a bib,
Und voudn't got tucked oop at nighdt in deir crib.
Veil! veil! ven I'm feeple und in life's decline,
May mine oldt age pe cheered by dot baby off mine.

A DUTCHMAN'S MISTAKE.

BY CHARLES F. ADAMS.

I geeps me von leedle schtore town Proadway, und does a pooty goot
peeznis, but I don't got mooch gapital to work mit, so I finds it
hard vork to get me all der gredits vot I vould like.

Last veek I hear about some goots dot a barty vas going to sell pooty
sheap, und so I writes dot man if he vould gief me der refusal of
dose goots for a gouple of days. He gafe me der refusal--dot is, he
sait I gouldn't haf dem--but he sait he vould gall on me und see mine
schtore, und den if mine schtanding in peesnis v