ulity in her to graft upon: no
pretending to whine myself into her confidence. She was proof against
amorous persuasion. She had reason in her love. Her penetration and
good sense made her hate all compliments that had not truth and nature in
them. What could I have done with her in any other place? and yet how
long, even there, was I kept in awe, in spite of natural incitement, and
unnatural instigations, (as I now think them,) by the mere force of that
native dignity, and obvious purity of mind and manners, which fill every
one with reverence, if not with holy love, as thou callest it,* the
moment he sees her!--Else, thinkest thou not, it was easy for me to be a
fine gentleman, and a delicate lover, or, at least a specious and
flattering one?

* See Letter XXI. of this volume.

Lady Sarah and Lady Betty, finding the treaty, upon the success of which
they have set their foolish hearts, likely to run into length, are about
departing to their own seats; having taken from me the best security the
nature of the case will admit of, that is to say, my word, to marry the
lady, if she will have me.

And after all, (methinks thou asked,) art thou still resolved to repair,
if reparation be put into thy power?

Why, Jack, I must needs own that my heart has now-and-then some
retrograde motions upon thinking seriously of the irrevocable ceremony.
We do not easily give up the desire of our hearts, and what we imagine
essential to our happiness, let the expectation or hope of compassing it
be ever so unreasonable or absurd in the opinion of others. Recurrings
there will be; hankerings that will, on every but-remotely-favourable
incident, (however before discouraged and beaten back by ill success,)
pop up, and abate the satisfaction we should otherwise take in
contrariant overtures.

'Tis ungentlemanly, Jack, man to man, to lie.----But matrimony I do not
heartily love--although with a CLARISSA--yet I am in earnest to marry
her.

But I am often thinking that if now this dear creature, suffering time,
and my penitence, my relations' prayers, and Miss Howe's mediation to
soften her resentments, (her revenge thou hast prettily* distinguished
away,) and to recall repulsed inclination, should consent to meet me at
the altar--How vain will she then make all thy eloquent periods of
execration!--How many charming interjections of her own will she spoil!
And what a couple of old patriarchs shall we become, going in the
mill-ho