y
We'll make you think you never was at home before
We've all got to come to it at last, anyway!
Widened, and deepened, and straightened--(Public river Project)
Wished that she could see his sufferings now
Your absence when you are present

MARK TWAIN'S SPEECHES

A little pride always goes along with a teaspoonful of brains
Ain't any real difference between triplets and an insurrection
Chastity, you can carry it too far
Classic: everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read
Don't know anything and can't do anything
Dwell on the particulars with senile rapture
Future great historian is lying--and doubtless will continue to
Head is full of history, and some of it is true, too
Humor enlivens and enlightens his morality
I shall never be as dead again as I was then
If can't make seventy by any but an uncomfortable road: don't go
Kill a lot of poets for writing about "Beautiful Spring"
Live upon the property of their heirs so long
Morality is all the better for his humor
Morals: rather teach them than practice them any day
Never been in jail, and the other is, I don't know why
Never to smoke when asleep, and never to refrain when awake
Patriotism is usually the refuge of the scoundrel
Please state what figure you hold him at--and return the basket
Principles is another name for prejudices
She bears our children--ours as a general thing
Some civilized women would lose half their charm without dress
The Essex band done the best it could
Time-expired man, to use Kipling's military phrase
To exaggerate is the only way I can approximate to the truth
Two kinds of Christian morals, one private and the other public
What, sir, would the people of the earth be without woman?
When in doubt, tell the truth
Women always want to know what is going on

SKETCHES NEW AND OLD

A wood-fire is not a permanent thing
Accessory before the fact to his own murder
Aggregate to positive unhappiness
Always brought in 'not guilty'
Apocryphal was no slouch of a word, emanating from the source
Assertion is not proof
Early to bed and early to rise
I am useless and a nuisance, a cumberer of the earth
I never was so scared before and survived it
If I had sprung a leak now I had been lost
Just about cats enough for three apiece all around
Looked a look of vicious happiness
Lucid and unintoxicated intervals
No matter how absurd and unreasonable their demands
No public can withstand magnanimity
Not because I was afraid, but