t sir, continued I, though I was so unseasonable as I was in the
garden, you would, I flatter myself, had you then heard me, have
pardoned my imprudence, and owned I had some cause to fear, and to wish
to be with my poor father and mother: and this I the rather say,
that you should not think me capable of returning insolence for your
goodness; or appearing foolishly ungrateful to you, when you was so kind
to me.

Indeed, Pamela, said he, you gave me great uneasiness; for I love you
too well not to be jealous of the least appearance of your indifference
to me, or preference to any other person, not excepting your parents
themselves. This made me resolve not to hear you; for I had not got
over my reluctance to marriage; and a little weight, you know, turns the
scale, when it hangs in an equal balance. But yet, you see, that though
I could part with you, while my anger held, yet the regard I had then
newly professed for your virtue, made me resolve not to offer to violate
it; and you have seen likewise, that the painful struggle I underwent
when I began to reflect, and to read your moving journal, between my
desire to recall you, and my doubt whether you would return, (though yet
I resolved not to force you to it,) had like to have cost me a severe
illness: but your kind and cheerful return has dispelled all my fears,
and given me hope, that I am not indifferent to you; and you see how
your presence has chased away my illness.

I bless God for it, said I; but since you are so good as to encourage
me, and will not despise my weakness, I will acknowledge, that I
suffered more than I could have imagined, till I experienced it, in
being banished your presence in so much anger; and the more still was I
affected, when you answered the wicked Mrs. Jewkes so generously in
my favour, at my leaving your house. For this, sir, awakened all my
reverence for you; and you saw I could not forbear, not knowing what I
did, to break boldly in upon you, and acknowledge your goodness on my
knees. 'Tis true, my dear Pamela, said he, we have sufficiently tortured
one another; and the only comfort that can result from it, will be,
reflecting upon the matter coolly and with pleasure, when all these
storms are overblown, (as I hope they now are,) and we sit together
secured in each other's good opinion, recounting the uncommon gradations
by which we have ascended to the summit of that felicity, which I hope
we shall shortly arrive at.

Meantime,