im to mercy, here and hereafter. The
remembrance of Theresa, not in her present state of self-abstraction,
but captivating as when she first received my vows before God, to 'love
and honour her, in sickness and in health,' haunted me through every
scene of domestic endearment, and pursued me even to the hearth whose
household deities I had blasphemed. I trembled when I heard my Helen
addressed as Lady Greville, when I saw her usurping the rights, and
occupying the place of one, who now appeared a nameless 'link between
the living and the dead.' I could not gaze upon the woman whose
affections had been so partially, so disinterestedly bestowed upon me,
and whose existence I had in return polluted by a pretended marriage.--I
could not behold of my boy, the descendant of two of the noblest houses
in Britain, yet upon whom the stain of illegitimacy might hereafter
rest, without feelings of self-accusation which filled the cup of life
with the waters of bitterness. Alas! its very springs were poisoned--and
Helen, however strong, however just thine indignation against thy
betrayer, believe, oh! believe that even in this life I have endured
no trifling measure of punishment for my deep offences against thee and
thine!

"But such is the frailty of human nature that it was upon these very
victims I suffered the effects of my remorse and mental agony to all.
The ill-suppressed violence of my temper, irritated by the dangers of
my situation, has already caused you many a sorrowful moment; and the
increase of gloom you must have lately perceived, has originated in the
fresh difficulties arising to me from the death of the husband of Alice;
and the dread of her own approaching dissolution. From these causes
my present visit to this dreary abode was determined, and to them I
am indebted for the premature disclosure which has made her life as
wretched as my own. The sickness of her surviving attendant has latterly
allowed more liberty to the unhappy Theresa than her condition renders
safe either to her or me. I could not on my arrival here collect
sufficient resolution to look upon her; and to adopt those measures
of security which the weakness of Alice has left disregarded. To this
infirmity of purpose on my part must be ascribed the dreadful shock
you sustained by the sudden appearance of the unfortunate maniac, who I
conclude was attracted to your apartment by the long-forgotten sound
of music. On that fatal evening your fall awoke