_

Vivat Regina."

I shall not here look back on the Spectacles of the _Greeks_ and
_Romans_ of this Kind, but must believe this Custom took its Rise from
the Ages of Knight-Errantry; from those who lov'd one Woman so well,
that they hated all Men and Women else; from those who would fight
you, whether you were or were not of their Mind; from those who
demanded the Combat of their Contemporaries, both for admiring their
Mistress or discommending her. I cannot therefore but lament, that the
terrible Part of the ancient Fight is preserved, when the amorous Side
of it is forgotten. We have retained the Barbarity, but lost the
Gallantry of the old Combatants. I could wish, methinks, these
Gentlemen had consulted me in the Promulgation of the Conflict. I was
obliged by a fair young Maid whom I understood to be called _Elisabeth
Preston_, Daughter of the Keeper of the Garden, with a Glass of Water;
whom I imagined might have been, for Form's sake, the general
Representative of the Lady fought for, and from her Beauty the proper
_Amarillis_ on these Occasions. It would have ran better in the
Challenge; _I_ James Miller, _Serjeant, who have travelled Parts
abroad, and came last from the Frontiers of_ Portugal, _for the Love
of_ Elizabeth Preston, _do assert, That the said_ Elizabeth is the
Fairest of Women. Then the Answer; _I_ Timothy Buck, _who have stay'd
in_ Great Britain _during all the War in Foreign Parts for the Sake
of_ Susanna Page, _do deny that_ Elizabeth Preston _is so fair as the
said_ Susanna Page. Let _Susanna Page_ look on, and I desire of _James
Miller_ no Favour.

This would give the Battel quite another Turn; and a proper Station
for the Ladies, whose Complexion was disputed by the Sword, would
animate the Disputants with a more gallant Incentive than the
Expectation of Mony from the Spectators; though I would not have that
neglected, but thrown to that Fair One whose Lover was approved by the
Donor.

Yet, considering the Thing wants such Amendments, it was carried with
great Order. _James Miller_ came on first; preceded by two disabled
Drummers, to shew, I suppose, that the Prospect of maimed Bodies did
not in the least deter him. There ascended with the daring _Miller_ a
Gentleman, whose Name I could not learn, with a dogged Air, as
unsatisfied that he was not Principal. This Son of Anger lowred at the
whole Assembly, and weighing himself as he march'd around from Side to
Side, with a stiff Knee