p and a cherry in the bottom?"

"And weak lemonade in between," grumbles Ambrose. "What do they take me
for, a gold fish?"

"We'll try a cabaret next," says I.

We did. They had the place fixed up fancy, too, blue and green toy
balloons floatin' around the ceilin', a peacock in a big gold cage,
tables ranged around the dancin' space, and the trombone artist puttin'
his whole soul into a pumpin' out "The Alcoholic Blues." And you could
order most anything off the menu, from a poulet casserole to a cheese
sandwich. Amby and 'Chita splurged on a cafe parfait and a grape juice
rickey. Other dissipated couples at nearby tables were indulgin' in
canapes of caviar and frosted sarsaparillas. But shortly after midnight
the giddy revellers begun to thin out and the girl waiters got yawny.

"How about a round of strawb'ry ice cream sodas; eh, Amby?" I suggests.

"No," says he, "I'm no high school girl. I've put away so much of that
sweet slush now that I'll be bilious for a week. But say, Torchy, honest
to goodness, is Broadway like this all the time now?"

"No," says I. "They're goin' to have a Y.W.C.A. convention here next
week and I expect that'll stir things up quite a bit."

"Sorry," says Amby, "but I shan't be here."

"No?" says I.

"Pos-i-tively," says Ambrose. "'Chita and I will be on our way back by
that time; back to good old Buenos Ayres, where there's more doing in a
minute than happens the whole length of Broadway in a month. And listen,
old son; when we open a bottle something besides the pop will come out
of it." "Better hurry," says I. "Maybe Pussyfoot Johnson's down there
now monkeying with the constitution."

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SEWELL FORD'S STORIES

May be had wherever books are sold. Ask for Grosset & Dunlap's list.

SHORTY McCABE. Illustrated by Francis Vaux Wilson.
A very humorous story. The hero, an independent and vigorous thinker,
sees life, and tells about it in a very unconventional way.

SIDE-STEPPING WITH SHORTY. Illustrated by Francis Vaux Wilson.
Twenty skits, presenting people with their foibles. Sympathy with
human nature and an abounding sense of humor are the requisites for
"side-stepping with Shorty."

SHORTY McCABE ON THE JOB. Illustrated by Francis Vaux Wilson.
Shorty McCabe reappears with his figures of speech revamped right up
to the minute. He aids in the right distribution of a "conscience
fund," and gi