CHAPTER X

'IKKY-BOY COMES ALONG

Being a parent grows on you, don't it? Course, at first, when it's
sprung on you so kind of sudden, you hardly know how to act. That is, if
you're makin' your debut in the part. And I expect for a few months
there, after young Richard Hemmingway Ballard came and settled down with
Vee and me, I put up kind of a ragged amateur performance as a fond
father. All I can say about it now is I hope I didn't look as foolish as
I felt.

As for Vee, she seemed to get her lines and business perfect from the
start. Somehow young mothers do. She knew how to handle the youngster
right off; how to hold him and what to say to him when he screwed up his
face and made remarks to her that meant nothing at all to me. And she
wasn't fussed or anything when company came in and caught her at it.
Also young Master Richard seemed to be right at home from the very
first. Didn't seem surprised or strange or nervous in the presence of
a pair of parents that he found wished on him without much warnin'. Just
gazed at us as calm and matter-of-fact as if he'd known us a long time.
While me, well it must have been weeks before I got over feelin' kind of
panicky whenever I was left alone with him.

But are we acquainted now? I'll say we are. In fact, as Harry Lander
used to put it, vurra well acquainted. Chummy, I might say. Why not,
after we've stood two years of each other without any serious dispute?
Not that I'm claimin' any long-distance record as a model parent. No. I
expect I do most of the things I shouldn't and only a few of them that I
should. But 'Ikky-boy ain't a critical youngster. That's his own way of
sayin' his name and mostly we call him that. Course, he answers to
others, too; such as Old Scout, and Snoodlekins, and young Rough-houser.
I mean, he does when he ain't too busy with important enterprises; such
as haulin' Buddy, the Airedale pup, around by the ears; or spoonin' in
milk and cereal, with Buddy watchin' hopeful for sideslips; or pullin'
out the spool drawer of Vee's work table.

It's been hinted to us by thoughtful friends who have all the scientific
dope on bringin' up children, although most of 'em never had any of
their own, that this is all wrong. Accordin' to them we ought to start
right in makin' him drop whatever he's doin' and come to us the minute
we call. Maybe we should, too. But that ain't the way it works out, for
generally, we don't want anything special, and he seems so