fter they shrunk too
small f'r me, 'n' yet I ain't a mite o' doubt but what, a'cordin' to
the Bible, I 'd ought to 'a' forgive him 'n' turned the other cheek
into the bargain. Mrs. Craig says 's Mr. Kimball ain't mincin' matters
none, but is jus' statin' all over 's it's all on a'count o' my havin'
bought the wool o' Shores; she says 't he says 't if I 'd bought it o'
him I 'd be wearin' all four pair this very day. She says 's Mrs.
Fisher says 's he told her 't, seein' things is 's they is, he's
lookin' to see them stockin's keep right on shrinkin' down through the
minister's family until they end up 's socks on the thirteenth baby. A
joke's a joke, 'n' I c'n see the p'int o' a good joke 's quick 's any
one, but I mus' say I fail to see any fun in such a remark. 'S far 's
my observation's 'xtended, there ain't nothin' ladylike in the
minister's wearin' my stockin's, nor yet in Mr. Kimball's entertainin'
the whole c'mmunity with 'em. A'cordin' to my manner o' thinkin', a
woman as 'll give away four pair o' brand-new hand-knit stockin's for
no better reason 'n 't the heels shrunk down under her instep, is
doin' a deed o' Christian charity instead o' layin' herself open to
all manner o' fun-makin'. 'N' I ain't the only one 's views the thing
so serious, either, for Mr. Shores feels jus' 's bad 's I do about it.
He come runnin' to catch me the other day, 'n' asked me 'f I had n't
mebbe used cold water for the first washin'. I did n't feel to thank
him none f'r his interest afore he opened his mouth, but I c'n assure
you, Mrs. Lathrop, 't after he'd spoke I jus' stood there
plum-petrified 'n' stock-starin' f'r 's much 's a minute afore I c'd
get voice to ask who give _him_ the authority to teach me how to wash
my own stockin's. 'N' then, when I _did_ speak, I made no bones 's to
sayin' jus' what I thought. I never was one to give my opinion o'
anythin' or anybody aroun' free, but I certainly did feel to be open
at Mr. Shores. I told him 's shrunk stockin's to my order o' thinkin'
was a species o' spilt milk 's knowed no turnin', 'n' I further told
him 't I 'd take it 's a great kindness 'f he 'n' the rest o' the town
would shut their mouths right up tight on my stockin's. I says to him,
I says, 'Mr. Shores, when your wife eloped I was one o' the few--the
_very_ few--'s blamed _her_, 'n' I beg 'n' pray 't the quality o' your
wool won't force me to change my mind. Your clerk 't she eloped with,'
I says, 'once give me a nickel