" said the old lady to the sardonic affianced of her daughter,
"there are three thousand men in the British army."

"Yes, my aunt."

"There are three thousand men in the British army," she repeated,
looking round angrily as though somebody had questioned the truth of her
statement. "I tell you that my grandfather's brother was at Cape Town in
the time of Governor Smith, and he counted the whole British army, and
there were three thousand of them."

"That is so, my aunt," answered Carolus.

"Then why did you contradict me, Carolus?"

"I did not intend to, my aunt."

"I should hope not, Carolus; it would vex the dear Lord to see a boy
with a squint" (Carolus was slightly afflicted in this way) "contradict
his future mother-in-law. Tell me how many Englishmen were killed at
Laing's Nek?"

"Nine hundred," replied Carolus promptly.

"And at Ingogo?"

"Six hundred and twenty."

"And at Majuba?"

"One thousand."

"Then that makes two thousand five hundred men; yes, and the rest
were finished at Bronker's Spruit. Nephews, that _rooibaatje_ there,"
pointing to John, "is one of the last men left in the British army."

Most of her audience appeared to accept this argument as conclusive, but
some mischievous spirit put it into the breast of the saturnine Carolus
to contradict her, notwithstanding the lesson he had just received.

"That is not so, my aunt; there are many damned Englishmen still
sneaking about the Nek, and also at Pretoria and Wakkerstroom."

"I tell you it is a lie," said the old lady, raising her voice, "they
are only Kafirs and camp-followers. There were three thousand men in the
British army, and now they are all killed except that _rooibaatje_. How
dare you contradict your future mother-in-law, you dirty squint-eyed,
yellow-faced monkey? There, take that!" and before the unfortunate
Carolus knew where he was, he received the slop-basin with its contents
full in the face. The bowl broke upon the bridge of his nose, and the
coffee flew all about him, into his eyes and hair, down his throat and
over his body, making such a spectacle of him as must have been seen to
be appreciated.

"Ah!" went on the old lady, much soothed and gratified by the eminent
and startling success of her shot, "never you say again that I don't
know how to throw a basin of coffee. I haven't practised at my man Hans
for thirty years for nothing, I can tell you. Now you, Carolus, I have
taught you not to contradict; go and