s that ever ran on the river) and I were
laying off at one time in New Orleans, and we took a notion we
would get a yacht and have a big sail. We laid in a supply of
provisions, and did not forget a five-gallon jug of whisky. We
went out to the lake, hired a yacht, and started. Bill was pretty
full, so I told him to go below and lay down for a while, and I
would look after the boat. The wind was shifting about, and I was
afraid the boom would knock him overboard. I was sailing along at
a fine rate, tacking about with the wind, and did not notice that
Bill had come up on deck until I heard him yell out to me. I looked
around and saw the big fat fellow floundering in the water about
100 feet away. I gave her all the rudder, downed sail, and then
threw out a line. Bill swam up and caught hold of the line, and
then I began pulling him in. I had landed many big suckers, but
Bill was no sucker; he was a whale. I got him up alongside, but I
was not man enough to pull him up, as the boat stood about four
feet out of the water. He was so full of whisky (and water) that
he could not help himself. He was about played out, when he said
to me, "George I'm a goner." I told him to hold on just a minute.
I got a small line, took two half-hitches around his arm, and then
made fast to the boat. I knew he could not go down unless his arm
pulled out, and there was no danger of that. I took a rest, and
then let on as if I was going to raise sail, when Bill said, "George,
what are you going to do?" I looked back at him and said, "I have
caught a whale, and am not able to pull him in, so I'm going to
tow him ashore." Bill looked at me just long enough to satisfy
himself that I was in earnest, and said, "For God's sake, George,
give me one more pull, for I don't want you to sail in with me in
tow." So I went to him, as I had got rested, and he had got sober;
we pulled together, and I soon had the big fellow on board. We
sailed around for some time; but when we had to make a tack, you
can bet your life that Bill was on the lookout for the boom. Every
time we would consult the jug, Bill would say, "George, don't tell
the boys about how much fun we have had on this trip, will you?"

THE DECK-HAND.

The deck-hands of the steamer _Niagara_ had been drinking, and some
of them were a little drunk. They came up to get more of the
fighting stuff, and got into some difficulty with the barkeeper.
I was sitting near the bar at th