ies were upon her, and those
words, "O dear, O dear, what shall I do?" rung in my ears for succeeding
hours and days. But God delivered her,--and she, without any violent pang
in the article of her dissolution, quietly and sweetly fell asleep, as I
hope, in Jesus, about ten at night, I being then at Maidwell. When I came
home my mind was under a dark cloud relating to the eternal state; but
God was pleased graciously to remove it, and gave me comfortable hopes,
after having felt the most heart-rending sorrow. My dear wife bore the
affliction in the most glorious manner, and discovered more wisdom, and
piety, and steadiness of temper in a few days, than I had ever in six
years an opportunity of observing before. O my soul, God has blasted thy
gourd; thy greatest earthly delight is gone: seek it in heaven, where I
hope this dear babe is; where I am sure that my Saviour is; and where I
trust, through grace, notwithstanding all this irregularity of temper and
of heart, that I shall shortly be.

Sunday, October 3, 1736

FURTHER REFLECTIONS AFTER THE FUNERAL OF MY DEAR BETSEY.

I have now been laying the delight of my eyes in the dust, and it is
for ever hidden from them. My heart was too full to weep much. We had a
suitable sermon from these words: "Doest thou well to be angry?" Jonah
iv. 9; because of the gourd. I hope God knows that I am not angry; but
sorrowful he surely allows me to be. I could have wished that more had
been said concerning the hope we may have of our child; and it was a
great disappointment to me that nothing of that kind should have been
said by one that loved her so well as my brother Hunt did. Yet, I bless
God, I have my hopes that she is lodged in the arms of Christ. And there
was an occurrence that I took much notice of; I was most earnestly
praying that God would be pleased to give me some further encouragement
on this head, by letting some new light, or by directing me to some
further thoughts upon the subject. Soon after, as I came into my wife's
chamber, she told me that our maid Betty, who had indeed the affection
of a parent for my dear girl, had just before assured her, that, on the
Sabbath day evening, Betsey would be repeating to herself some things of
what she had heard in my prayers and in my preachings, but did not
care to talk of it to others; and my wife assured me that she solemnly
recommended herself to God in the words that I had taught her a little
before she died. Blessed G