t is absolutely parched--I was near being hanged!"

"Hanged!"

"Yes. Upon my life it's true,--very horrible, ain't it? It had a great
effect upon my nervous system; and they never thought of any little pension
to me as a recompense for my sufferings."

"And who was barbarous enough to think of such a thing, Major?"

"Sir Arthur Wellesley himself,--none other, Charley?"

"Oh, it was a mistake, Major, or a joke."

"It was devilish near being a practical one, though. I'll tell you how it
occurred. After the battle of Vimeira, the brigade to which I was attached
had their headquarters at San Pietro, a large convent where all the church
plate for miles around was stored up for safety. A sergeant's guard was
accordingly stationed over the refectory, and every precaution taken to
prevent pillage, Sir Arthur himself having given particular orders on the
subject. Well, somehow,--I never could find out how,--but in leaving the
place, all the wagons of our brigade had got some trifling articles of
small value scattered, as it might be, among their stores,--gold cups,
silver candlesticks, Virgin Marys, ivory crucifixes, saints' eyes set in
topazes, and martyrs' toes in silver filagree, and a hundred other similar
things.

"One of these confounded bullock-cars broke down just at the angle of the
road where the commander-in-chief was standing with his staff to watch the
troops defile, and out rolled, among bread rations and salt beef, a whole
avalanche of precious relics and church ornaments. Every one stood aghast!
Never was there such a misfortune. No one endeavored to repair the mishap,
but all looked on in terrified amazement as to what was to follow.

"'Who has the command of this detachment?' shouted out Sir Arthur, in a
voice that made more than one of us tremble.

"'Monsoon, your Excellency,--Major Monsoon, of the Portuguese brigade.'

"'The d--d old rogue, I know him!' Upon my life that's what he said. 'Hang
him up on the spot,' pointing with his finger as he spoke; 'we shall see
if this practice cannot be put a stop to.' And with these words he rode
leisurely away, as if he had been merely ordering dinner for a small party.

"When I came up to the place the halberts were fixed, and Gronow, with a
company of the Fusiliers, under arms beside them.

"'Devilish sorry for it, Major,' said he; 'It's confoundedly unpleasant;
but can't be helped. We've got orders to see you hanged.'

"Faith, it was just so he said it,