istence.
'It sounds horrid, don't it?' said Miss Podsnap, with a penitential
face.
Mrs Lammle, not very well knowing what to answer, resolved herself into
a look of smiling encouragement.
'But it is, and it always has been,' pursued Miss Podsnap, 'such a trial
to me! I so dread being awful. And it is so awful! No one knows what
I suffered at Madame Sauteuse's, where I learnt to dance and make
presentation-curtseys, and other dreadful things--or at least where they
tried to teach me. Ma can do it.'
'At any rate, my love,' said Mrs Lammle, soothingly, 'that's over.'
'Yes, it's over,' returned Miss Podsnap, 'but there's nothing gained by
that. It's worse here, than at Madame Sauteuse's. Ma was there, and Ma's
here; but Pa wasn't there, and company wasn't there, and there were not
real partners there. Oh there's Ma speaking to the man at the piano! Oh
there's Ma going up to somebody! Oh I know she's going to bring him
to me! Oh please don't, please don't, please don't! Oh keep away, keep
away, keep away!' These pious ejaculations Miss Podsnap uttered with her
eyes closed, and her head leaning back against the wall.
But the Ogre advanced under the pilotage of Ma, and Ma said, 'Georgiana,
Mr Grompus,' and the Ogre clutched his victim and bore her off to his
castle in the top couple. Then the discreet automaton who had surveyed
his ground, played a blossomless tuneless 'set,' and sixteen disciples
of Podsnappery went through the figures of - 1, Getting up at eight and
shaving close at a quarter past - 2, Breakfasting at nine - 3, Going to
the City at ten - 4, Coming home at half-past five - 5, Dining at seven,
and the grand chain.
While these solemnities were in progress, Mr Alfred Lammle (most loving
of husbands) approached the chair of Mrs Alfred Lammle (most loving of
wives), and bending over the back of it, trifled for some few seconds
with Mrs Lammle's bracelet. Slightly in contrast with this brief airy
toying, one might have noticed a certain dark attention in Mrs Lammle's
face as she said some words with her eyes on Mr Lammle's waistcoat, and
seemed in return to receive some lesson. But it was all done as a breath
passes from a mirror.
And now, the grand chain riveted to the last link, the discreet
automaton ceased, and the sixteen, two and two, took a walk among
the furniture. And herein the unconsciousness of the Ogre Grompus was
pleasantly conspicuous; for, that complacent monster, believing that
he
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