I was wrong, and that
the withdrawal of my letter would be a great help to the Government. I
replied that my weekly editorials in the _Christian Guardian_ (of which
I had consented to be re-elected Editor) showed that I was anxious to
suppress the factious and party hatreds of the day, and to place the
Government upon a broad foundation of loyalty and justice; that what I
had written in the case of Mr. Bidwell had been written by me as an
individual and not as the editor of the organ of a religious body, and
had been written from the firm conviction of Mr. Bidwell's innocence,
and that his case involved the fundamental and essential rights of every
British subject; and that, however anxious I was to meet His
Excellency's wishes, I could not withdraw my letter. I then bowed myself
out from the presence of Sir George, who, from that hour became my
enemy, and afterwards warned Lord Sydenham against me as "a dangerous
man," as Lord Sydenham laughingly told me the last evening I spent with
him in Montreal, at his request, and before his lamented death.

[66] These remarks will be found on page 83 of the _Guardian_ of 2nd
April.

[67] This loss of friendship with Dr. Ryerson may be explained by the
following reference to Mr. Bidwell, in a letter from Dr. Ryerson, to his
brother John, dated, Kingston, 29th May, 1838:--From an intimate
religious friend of Mr. Bidwell, I learn that during the last few years
he had acted more after a worldly policy, common to politicians, and
had, therefore, partly laid himself open to the censure which he has
received. I am also sensible of his prejudices against me of late years,
and of the great injury which I have thereby sustained. I had some
difficulty to overcome my own feelings in the first instance. But as far
as individual feelings and interests are concerned, "it is the glory of
man to pass over a transgression," generous as well as just, as we have
received help from Bidwell himself when we could not help ourselves, and
were trampled upon by a desperate party. If others had seen the letters
from Bidwell to Mr. Cassidy, which I have been permitted to read, I am
sure the noble generosity of their hearts would be excited in all its
sympathies. I do not think, however, that he will ever return to this
Province to reside. That appears to be altogether out of the question
with him; but that does not alter the nature of the case.

I have replied to Mr. Hagerman with calmness, but with deep