Willum J. O'Brien, they'd betther bombard him first. I'd hate to
be th' man that 'd be called to roll with him to his doom. He cud lick
th' whole Civic Featheration."
"I believe ye," said Mr. Dooley. "He's a powerful man. But I hear
there is, as ye say, what th' pa-apers 'd call a movement on fut f'r
to dec'rate Chris'mas threes with aldhermen, an' 'tis wan that ought
to be encouraged. Nawthin' cud be happyer, as Hogan says, thin th'
thought iv cillybratin' th' season be sthringin' up some iv th'
fathers iv th' city where th' childher cud see thim. But I'm afraid,
Hinnissy, that you an' me won't see it. 'Twill all be over soon, an'
Willum J. O'Brien 'll go by with his head just as near his shoulders
as iver. 'Tis har-rd to hang an aldherman, annyhow. Ye'd have to
suspind most iv thim be th' waist.
"Man an' boy, I've been in this town forty year an' more; an' divvle
th' aldherman have I see hanged yet, though I've sthrained th' eyes
out iv me head watchin' f'r wan iv thim to be histed anny pleasant
mornin'. They've been goin' to hang thim wan week an' presintin' thim
with a dimon' star th' next iver since th' year iv th' big wind, an'
there's jus' as manny iv thim an' jus' as big robbers as iver there
was.
"An' why shud they hang thim, Hinnissy? Why shud they? I'm an honest
man mesilf, as men go. Ye might have ye'er watch, if ye had wan, on
that bar f'r a year, an' I'd niver touch it. It wudden't be worth me
while. I'm an honest man. I pay me taxes, whin Tim Ryan isn't assessor
with Grogan's boy on th' books. I do me jooty; an' I believe in th'
polis foorce, though not in polismen. That's diff'rent. But honest as
I am, between you an' me, if I was an aldherman, I wudden't say, be
hivins, I think I'd stand firm; but--well, if some wan come to me an'
said, 'Dooley, here's fifty thousan' dollars f'r ye'er vote to betray
th' sacred inthrests iv Chicago,' I'd go to Father Kelly an' ask th'
prayers iv th' congregation.
"'Tis not, Hinnissy, that this man Yerkuss goes up to an aldherman an'
says out sthraight, 'Here, Bill, take this bundle, an' be an infamious
scoundhrel.' That's th' way th' man in Mitchigan Avnoo sees it, but
'tis not sthraight. D'ye mind Dochney that was wanst aldherman here?
Ye don't. Well, I do. He ran a little conthractin' business down be
Halsted Sthreet 'Twas him built th' big shed f'r th' ice comp'ny. He
was a fine man an' a sthrong wan. He begun his political career be
lickin' a plasthrer be th
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