that minister to want wimmen to climb
up onto pedestals when they have to do their own housework."

"Well, I say it hain't onreasonable. You ort to be up on one, Samantha."

(How much Miss Trimble must have made on him. He wuz so oncommon clever,
and he never wuz megum, poor creeter!) I didn't really want to git into
an argument at that time o' day, but I see he wuz on the wrong tact, and
I felt I must convince him, so I sez in reasonable axents:

"I jest as lives be on a pedestal as not, I'd kinder love to if I could
set, I always did enjoy bein' riz up, if I had nothin' to do only to
stay up there some time, but wimmen have to git round so much it
wouldn't work. How could I take a tower histed up like the car of
Juggernaut or a Pope in a procession. I couldn't get carriers for one
thing, and I wouldn't give a cent to be carried round anyway with my
dizzy spells, I should more'n as likely as not fall off. But that hain't
the main reason I'm agin it, it is too tuckerin' a job for wimmen."

"Tuckerin' to be enthroned on a pedestal with the male sect lookin' up
to you and worshippin' you. You call that tuckerin'?" sez he.

"Yes," sez I, "I do. How under the sun can I or any other woman be up on
a pedestal and do our own housework, cookin', washin' dishes, sweepin',
moppin', cleanin' lamps, blackin' stoves, washin', ironin', makin' beds,
quiltin' bed quilts, gittin' three meals a day, day after day, biled
dinners and bag puddin's and mince pies and things, to say nothin' of
custard and pumpkin pies that will slop over on the level, do the best
you can; how could you keep 'em inside the crust histin' yourself up and
down? And cleanin' house time----"

"Mebby," sez I honestly, "it would come handy in whitewashin' or fixin'
the stovepipe, but where would it be in cleanin' mop-boards, or puttin'
down carpets, or washin' winders, or doin' a three weeks washin', or
bilin' soap? or pickin' geese? They act like fury shot up on the barn
floor. How could you git our old gander up on a pedestal? His temper is
that fiery, to say nothin' of settin' or standin' on it and holdin' on
to the old thing and pickin' it. And raisin' chickens and washin' old
trousers and overalls, and cleanin' sullers and paintin' floors and
paperin', and droudgin' round all the time, as a woman has to to keep
her house comfortable.

"And pickin' black-caps and strawberries, and churnin' big churnin's of
butter, and pickin' wool, to say nothin' of onexpe