re
mutual aid society is nix, Mr. Birsky. Why should I take from my salary
a dollar a week for five weeks, understand me, while a lot of old
_Schnorrers_ like them pressers in there is liable to die on us any
minute, y'understand, and right away we got to pay out a death benefit
for forty or fifty dollars?"

"What are you talking about a death benefit?" Birsky exclaimed. "Why
should you got death benefits in a mutual aid society? A mutual aid
society, which if you got any idee about the English language at all,
Golnik, means a society which the members helps each other, Golnik; and
if a member goes to work and dies, Golnik, he couldn't help nobody no
more. In a mutual aid society, Golnik, if a member dies he is dead,
understand me, and all he gets out is what he puts in less his share of
what it costs to run the society."

Golnik laid down his shears and gazed earnestly at his employer.

"I never thought that way about it before," he said; "but, anyhow, Mr.
Birsky, _Gott soll hueten_ such a feller shouldn't die sudden,
understand me, then we got to pay him a sick benefit yet five dollars a
week; and the least such a _Schlemiel_ lingers on us is ten weeks,
which you could see for yourself, Mr. Birsky, where do I get off?"

"Well, you would be anyhow president, Golnik--ain't it?" Birsky said.

"Sure, I know, Mr. Birsky," Golnik continued; "but what is the _Kunst_
a feller should be president, understand me, if I got to pay every week
my good money for a lot of operators which they _fress_ from pickles
and fish, understand me, till they are black in the face _mit_ the
indigestion, y'understand, while me I never got so much as a headache
even? So I guess you are right, after all, Mr. Birsky. A feller which
he is such a big fool that he joins one of them there mutual aid
societies deserves he should get fired right out of here."

"_Aber_, Golnik," Birsky protested, "me and Zapp has changed our minds
already and we are agreeable we should have such a society, which you
would be president and Kanef vice-president."

There was a note of anxiety in Birsky's voice that caused Golnik to
hesitate before replying, and he immediately conjectured that Birsky's
reconsideration of the mutual aid society plan had been made on grounds
not entirely altruistic.

"Well," he said at length, "of course if you and Mr. Zapp is changed
your minds, Mr. Birsky, I couldn't kick; _aber_, if it's all the same
to you, you should please leave m