perfection, for they had to walk the chalk.

And yet I've often wondered if they really always walked,
And sat upright like statues, and never laughed or talked,
For I've often heard my father say the model of the school
Got licked at least three times a day as a pretty general rule,
And lament the good old method, as a lost, forgotten art,
Of imparting knowledge in a way that made a fellow _smart_.

I wish we had the secret now of making boys walk
Instead of always watching for a chance to throw some chalk;
But the art, I think, was buried with the Blue-back Spelling Book,
And the piercing eye of Skinny, that no mortal boy could brook;
'Twas buried with the benches and the ancient dunce's stool
And the grease-glazed paper windows of the good old country school.

It may be through psychology and molly-coddle stuff,
We often talk in institutes, we've lost the power to bluff;
Perhaps 'twas Pestalozzi, Froebel and John Herbart
Who robbed the wand of Skinny of its pedagogic art;
We'll not discuss philosophy, but we know about the chalk,
That no theoretic dream of man can make a boy walk.

ONE-ARMED JOE

Ricollect ol' _One-Armed Joe_?
Lost it grindin' cane.
Same blame feller 't used to go
Round with Lizy Jane
Grindin' sorghum ever fall.
Lizy Jane wuz Joe's ol' mare;
Never showed her at a fair,
But blamed 'f she couldn't beat all
Ringsters to an ol' cane sweep
That ever stepped a mile. Never fat,
Ring-bone an' bob-tail an' all that,
But law! she made the cane-mill weep!

An' us chillern, we'd allus go
Over where they's grindin' cane
An' git to ride ol' Lizy Jane,
An' hear the jokes of _One-Armed Joe_;
An' maybe git the sorghum skimmin's,
Thwuzzent allus so many wimmins
Bossin' round, cause _One-Armed Joe_,
He loved us chillern bettern them.
(Bet he wears a diadem
In the world where preachers go).

Joe had grit and feelin's, too,
An' they wuzzent nothin' he couldn't do,
'Cept to do another harm:
Ketch a possum, kill a bear,
Cuss an' dance, or lead in prayer;
Jump a rope, or skin a cat,
Make a speech or guess a riddle,
Sing a song, or play the fiddle--
No, Joe couldn't quite do that,
Cause _One-Armed Joe_ had lost an arm,
But that's all he couldn't do.

One night dogs treed a coon
Up a l