nger to me, and who did
not care a button for any of us--should poke his nose into my affairs.
He sniffed and smelled my tracks, and found out where I went on Sabbath
afternoons, and got me into trouble. He swore that he himself saw me
eating forbidden food at the house of "Mr. Sergeant," and that I was
smoking a cigarette on the Sabbath. "May I see myself enjoying all that
is good!" he cried. "If it is not as I say, may I never get to the
place where I am going," he said. "And if I am uttering the least word
of falsehood, may my mouth be twisted to one side, and may my two eyes
drop out of my head," he added.

"Amen! May it be so," I cried.

And I caught from my father another smack in the face. I must not be
insolent, he told me....

But I imagine I am rushing along too quickly with my story. I am giving
you the soup before the fish. I was forgetting entirely to tell you who
Ephraim Log-of-wood was, and what he was, and how the incident happened.

At the end of the town, on the other side of the bridge, there lived a
Jew named Ephraim Log-of-wood. Why was he called Log-of-wood? Because he
had once dealt in timber. And today he is not dealing in timber because
something happened to him. He said it was libel, a false accusation.
People found at his place a strange log of wood with a strange name
branded on it. And he had a fine lot of trouble after that. He had a
case, and he had appeals, and he had to send petitions. He just managed
to escape from being put into prison. From that time, he threw away all
trading, and betook himself to looking after public matters. He pushed
himself into all institutions, the tax-collecting, and the work done at
the House of Learning. Generally speaking, he was not so well off. He
was often put to shame publicly. But as time went on, he insinuated
himself into everybody's bones. He gave people to understand that "He
knew where a door was opening." And in the course of time, Ephraim
became a useful person, a person it was hard to do without. That is how
a worm manages to crawl into an apple. He makes himself comfortable,
makes a soft bed for himself, makes himself a home, and in time becomes
the real master of the house.

In person, Ephraim was a tiny little man. He had short little legs, and
small little hands, and red little cheeks, and a quick walk which was a
sort of a little dance. And he tossed his little head about. His speech
was rapid, and his voice squeaky. And he laughed w