of a temple, a glorious promenade in the upper
spheres, a tragic storm with tragically cheerful pauses of memory and
meditation, all accompanied by laughing genii that adorned and crowned
the pillars of the structure of his dreams.
He went to the piano, began playing the melancholy leading motif and the
two subsidiary themes, counterpointed them, ran into lofty crescendos,
introduced variations, modulated and sang at the same time. The pupils
of his eyes became distended until they shone behind his glasses like
seas of green fire. Regina Sussmann fell on her knees by the piano. It
may be that she was so affected by his playing that she could not act
otherwise; and it may be that she wished thereby to give him visible
proof of her respect and adoration. All of a sudden the woman became
repulsive to him. The unleashed longing of her eyes filled him with
disgust. Her kneeling position appealed to him as a gesture of mockery
and ridicule: a memory had been desecrated. He sprang to his feet and
rushed out of the room, leaving her behind and quite alone. He never
said a word; he merely bit his lips in anger and left. When he came back
home late that night, he was afraid he might meet her again; but she was
not there. Only a letter lay on the table by the lamp.
She wrote that she had understood him; that she understood he had been
living in the past as if in an impregnable fortress, surrounded by
shadows that were not to be dispelled or disturbed by the presumption of
any living human being. She remarked that she had neither intention nor
desire to encroach upon his peace of mind, that she was merely concerned
for his future, and was wondering how he would fight down his hunger of
body and soul.
"Shameless wretch," cried Daniel, "a spy and a woman!"
She remarked, with almost perverse humility, that she had recognised his
greatness, that he was the genius she had been waiting for, and that her
one desire was to serve him. That is, she wished to serve him at a
distance, seeing that he could not endure her presence. She implored him
to grant her this poor privilege, not merely for his own sake, but for
the sake of humanity as well.
Daniel threw the letter in the stove. In the night he woke up with a
burning desire for delicate contact with an untouched woman. He dreamed
of a smile on the face of a seventeen-year-old girl innocently playing
around him--and shuddered at himself and the thought of himself.
Shortly after
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