his patience with it wholly and shatter it like glass. Men
were fools and liars, and impostors and quackery reigned supreme. "And
in a world like this, George," he was concluding with a tragic emphasis,
"I see nothing for it, for two honest men like you and me, but just to
sit down on yon heap of road metal and have a quiet smoke together."

I wish I could tell the third story with half the gusto with which
Dawson related it. At the time of that visit to Germany of which I have
already spoken, there was no Prussian Empire. Bismarck may, even then,
have dreamed of it, but what is now a united Germany was split into
an infinite number of little principalities. In one of these, a Serene
Transparency--or some personage of that order--held rule over a handful
of subjects. It happened that he was a profound worshipper of Carlyle,
regarding him as the greatest humorist, philosopher and historian of his
age. He wrote to Carlyle a letter full of German enthusiasms, begging
him to name an hour at which he could present himself for the personal
delivery of his homage. "But," said Carlyle, "we are in the man's
territory and it is only in the fitness of things that we should pay our
respects to him." Accordingly the two set out together and reaching the
palace proposed to send in their names. They were encountered by
some kind of glorified flunkey, an official of the toy court of the
principality--who assured Carlyle that it was impossible to present him
to the Serene Transparency in the costume he was then wearing. Carlyle
wanted sardonically to know what was the matter with the costume, and
the major-domo instanced his hat. Carlyle tore the hat savagely from
his head and punched it two or three times before he thundered: If His
Serene Transparency objected to the hat he might object; it was the only
hat the philosopher owned and he had no immediate intention to provide
himself with another! And whilst he was brandishing the hat and raging
at the astonished major-domo, who should appear on the scene but His
Serene Transparency, who rushed forward and, falling on his knees,
embraced the legs of the amazed philosopher. Dawson declared the whole
scene to have been beyond pen and pencil. Carlyle's face was a wonder
for wrath and astonishment, but that of the court official was beyond
speaking for amazement. Who or what he supposed the visitor to be was
altogether beyond conjecture!

I was still waiting for that promised invitation to R