I found out the real one. And I should
leave it alone.'

So Painted Jaguar did as he was told, especially about leaving them
alone; but the curious thing is that from that day to this, O Best
Beloved, no one on the banks of the turbid Amazon has ever called
Stickly-Prickly and Slow-Solid anything except Armadillo. There are
Hedgehogs and Tortoises in other places, of course (there are some in
my garden); but the real old and clever kind, with their scales lying
lippety-lappety one over the other, like pine-cone scales, that lived on
the banks of the turbid Amazon in the High and Far-Off Days, are always
called Armadillos, because they were so clever.

So that; all right, Best Beloved. Do you see?

I'VE never sailed the Amazon,
I've never reached Brazil;
But the Don and Magdelana,
They can go there when they will!

Yes, weekly from Southampton,
Great steamers, white and gold,
Go rolling down to Rio
(Roll down--roll down to Rio!)
And I'd like to roll to Rio
Some day before I'm old!

I've never seen a Jaguar,
Nor yet an Armadill
O dilloing in his armour,
And I s'pose I never will,

Unless I go to Rio
These wonders to behold--
Roll down--roll down to Rio--
Roll really down to Rio!
Oh, I'd love to roll to Rio
Some day before I'm old!

HOW THE FIRST LETTER WAS WRITTEN

ONCE upon a most early time was a Neolithic man. He was not a Jute or an
Angle, or even a Dravidian, which he might well have been, Best Beloved,
but never mind why. He was a Primitive, and he lived cavily in a Cave,
and he wore very few clothes, and he couldn't read and he couldn't write
and he didn't want to, and except when he was hungry he was
quite happy. His name was Tegumai Bopsulai, and that means,
'Man-who-does-not-put-his-foot-forward-in-a-hurry'; but we, O Best
Beloved, will call him Tegumai, for short. And his wife's name
was Teshumai Tewindrow, and that means,
'Lady-who-asks-a-very-many-questions'; but we, O Best Beloved, will
call her Teshumai, for short. And his little girl-daughter's name
was Taffimai Metallumai, and that means,
'Small-person-without-any-manners-who-ought-to-be-spanked'; but I'm
going to call her Taffy. And she was Tegumai Bopsulai's Best Beloved and
her own Mummy's Best Beloved, and she was not spanked